


Que Sera Sera

by Rockrgrl4



Category: Naruto
Genre: F/M, Semi-Canonical Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2010-05-25
Updated: 2018-07-17
Packaged: 2019-06-07 16:09:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 23,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15222830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rockrgrl4/pseuds/Rockrgrl4
Summary: Kankuro of the Sand has fallen for Haruno Sakura of the Leaf, but refuses to acknowledge it, despite Sakura's obvious interest in him as well. The two of them cannot seem to find their way to each other, even though fate has lighted the path for them both for years. Will they be able to let go of their pride and sense of duty to be happy with one another, or will they lose perhaps the one chance at love they will ever have?Older Kanku/Saku, non-canonical in that it doesn't follow Boruto storyline. Crossposted.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This story is currently under examination for revamping. Please bear with me while changes are made, though I anticipate that any necessary changes will be minor and only serve to enhance the length and quality of earlier chapters. Later chapters have already undergone changes, as they are longer and better developed. Thank you for your patience, and thank you for reading.

“Oh Kami I’ve missed you,” he whispered, pressing a kiss softly behind her ear. “You’re everything I’ve thought about since I left.”  
She nuzzled her nose into his neck, grabbing fistfuls of his hair. She pressed her body into his, almost desperately. She brought her mouth back up to his, pressing heated, fervent kisses everywhere she could. On his face, his mouth, his lips…  
He grabbed the back of her head and brought her back to his lips, capturing her in a passionate, heated kiss. A groan escaped his mouth and he grinded his hips into hers, already feeling his member’s hardness. A growl escaped his throat, and a need was making itself known A need for her, to protect her, to love her, to make her happy. He pulled her back to look into her face, his hand gently caressing her cheek, softly, lovingly. He stared into her deep emerald eyes, and reveled in them. Her face, flushed as pink as her hair, was heated as she grew more and more flustered from his kisses. Her lips, so soft, so decadent, were swollen. Her chest was heaving in an effort to regain her breath and her eyes closed for just a moment, to savor it.  
So beautiful.  
Slowly, she opened her eyes, taking in his face, and brown eyes stared back with such passion and intensity, but with overwhelming tenderness. His hair was wild and unruly, poking out of his cat-mask, which was tilting off of his head, askew. Arms were around her waist, pulling her tighter to him, and she felt his hot breath by her ear and shuddered. “Kami, I love you…” he whispered hoarsely, trying to disguise the longing and the need. Trying, and failing miserably.  
For, in truth, as much as it had hurt his pride to admit, she really was everything to him. She calmed him down when he was mad, made him laugh, made him happy. No other woman, with all the crappy relationships he’d had before in the past, had ever succeeded in doing that. One look at Haruno, Sakura, however, and Kankuro of the sand completely melted. Everything that ever was, every bit of his past, present, and future worries disappeared, leaving only her left in its place. Her face, her laugh, her smile…  
Oh, but of course it had hurt his manly pride at first. To think, that he, Kankuro of the Sand, the great puppet master, and one of the three fierce protectors of Sunagakure, would give up everything-his name, rank, and life, for one girl, all because he fell in love.  
What was he, a sentimental fool?  
No.  
He would make her leave…that was his solution. She was here on a mission to help improve Suna’s medical core since it very truly was a joke. He would just tell her to pack up, that they’ve got it all under control. He was in charge of the project anyway, according to Gaara, his younger brother and Kazekage of Suna. He made his way to the hospital, where she’d been working non-stop, hours at a time, to help out his village. He slowed his steps and faltered a bit…  
No! She cannot stay!  
And he continued on, his anger rising in every step. He would deal with this now. Right now.  
He pushed his way through the main doors, up the stairs and to her office and threw open the door to find…  
A sleeping Sakura, bags under her eyes, head resting on a mountain of paperwork and looking utterly beautiful.  
Damn it.


	2. Perspectives

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is currently under examination for revamping. Please bear with me while changes are made, though I anticipate that any necessary changes will be minor and only serve to enhance the length and quality of earlier chapters. Later chapters have already undergone changes, as they are longer and better developed. Thank you for your patience, and thank you for reading.

Haruno Sakura had always thought the transition from the fire country to the wind country was beautiful. Starting from her home, Konohagakure, the landscape was thick with green. The climate in Konoha was mild, and although it would occasionally get hot, it was suitable for many species of plants, herbs, and trees to grow. As a result, the environment surrounding Konoha was lush, green and lively. However, it could feel suffocating. Sakura knew that firsthand.  
The whole area was surrounded by forest, and while the trees were beautiful, it enclosed the village like a vise. With the help of the cliffs, of course, the village felt like a trap; it felt as if the village had a chokehold on all enclosed within its clutches. Everyone could feel it, and Sakura could especially feel it because she was a shinobi.  
If you were a shinobi-no matter what village you belonged to-you were controlled. Shinobi were told what to do with their lives, when to leave home, even when to put their lives at stake. Order had to be obtained.  
In the wilderness, Sakura was free. At least for a little while she could breathe, and pretend to be herself. That idea in itself added to Sakura’s enjoyment to leaving the village (for missions), but the real treat was the desert.  
But first, she had to have a reason to go there.  
Then, it came to her.  
Tsunade, the fifth Hokage of Konoha and Sakura’s ex-mentor, had given her a mission to Suna.  
For a whole year…  
Sakura smiled.  
Her mission was to train Suna’s medics, and hopefully make an impact on the efficiency of their hospital. Sakura had reviewed the reports of the progress of their patients, and she almost snorted. The ratings truly were terrible. Firstly, the staffing issues had to be confronted. Civilian doctors being overworked and having to tend to injured shinobi? That simply wasn’t acceptable. For minor wounds, sure, but not serious ones, because their chakra networks could also be damaged and need to be repaired. Only a steady amount of chakra could do that, and only trained shinobi medics could control chakra. Shinobi need shinobi medics, period. If the need arises, shinobi doctors could tend to civilians, but the need for that is rare.  
Suna must really need some help in their medical department, and that made Sakura all the more eager to get to her destination. Pumping chakra to her feet, she continued on her way, although this time at a faster pace than before.  
When you get past the forests of Konoha, there are many rolling green hills and pastures, perfect for farmland. There, you could also find a wide variety of herbs and flowers. Konoha medics and often genin teams were sent here to collect the plants that could not be stored or grown in Konoha’s greenhouses. Sakura also spent much of her apprenticeship in these fields, taking what she would need to concoct whatever complicated medicines and salves her shishou would demand of her. More than once, the two women, mentor and apprentice, would roam the fields, and discuss the potential uses for each plant.  
That was years ago, however, and Sakura had already far surpassed the old woman.  
Yes, she had far surpassed the old woman…  
…the old woman to whom she owed her entire career. She truly owed her shishou a lot. One day, she would make it up to her.

Eventually, when you emerged from the meadows and the rivers and other water sources started dying off, you would reach the border between the fire and wind countries. Though most would think that the border would be heavily guarded with shinobi, most borders are not. The great shinobi wars had hit everyone’s numbers pretty hard. It is impossible, with the numbers available to most villages right now, for there to be shinobi stretched across that wide of a distance and the border to still be heavily guarded. Thus, there are only a select number of guard towers and bases set up on each side for border patrol.  
Which made crossing borders undetected ridiculously easy…for shinobi, anyway.  
It is here, on the border, that the grass slowly dies away, and plants and other greens become sparse. The water sources dry up the further you continue, and with the region getting so little rain…  
There is sand.  
A vast ocean of it splays out across the landscape, moving and rippling as the wind soothes the body from the almost unbearable heat. The sand shifts, moves, slinks and crawls. It flows along, caught in the winds current, being pushed around and told what to do.  
The sand reminded Sakura of herself. It seemed as if she and the sand had a lot in common.  
The whole of the landscape was sand being blown around an endless horizon. There were no obstructions like trees or shrubs or grass to get in the sand’s way. Each grain could be carried off into the breeze, and Sakura envied it. The sand was free to go anywhere.  
It was free.  
The sand had hope. The sand had opportunity, with no obstructions. The sand was carefree.  
Yes, Sakura envied it, and she loved the desert because of it-because of all these reasons.  
Either way, Sakura unwrapped the cloth that was protecting her face from the sand and wind. She was nearing the giant, looming structure of Suna’s main gate.  
Haruno Sakura had arrived in Suna.

~~~~~~The Night Before, In Suna~~~~~~

In Suna, Kankuro of the sand was staring out at the starry night just outside of his room. From where he was standing, which was on the balcony outside of his quarters at the Kazekage mansion, the sand’s shifting made it look as if the ground itself was moving. Under the faint glow of the desert moon, each sand particle reflected the dim white light, and when this sensation accompanied the wind shifting the sand, it truly did look like an ocean. Waves of the glittering sand crashed upon dwellings and walls, building up into piles and shifting away just as quickly, disappearing.  
Kankuro thought life was like that, too.  
The sand-the physical evidence of the life we all live-is blowing around all the time. Constantly, the sand is moving, shifting, slinking, taking hits and whatever else life throws at you. The sand bounces light off its back, while fighting the many currents of the wind. Each current wants the sand to go its own way, until finally it gets thrown together in a pile, overlooked and a nuisance to the people who just have to move it out of their way in the morning.  
The sand was much like himself, Kankuro mused.  
There was a constant light shining on him, whether someone needed his help or just glorifies him because he is the Kazekage’s brother, and the former Kazekage’s son. They throw him into the spotlight, and he nearly drowns in it. Then he has to fight the currents of the wind-those who determine his future-the village elders, in other words. They are always and forever will be trying to control the lives of himself and his siblings. Who they will marry, what duties they will perform, it didn’t matter to them, as long as they got their way, and someone was always left unhappy. On every subject, there were at least four different opinions, like the wind shifting from different directions. It was constantly fighting to control which way the sand will move until there’s no where it can go, until it turns out to amount to nothing, and ends up forgotten.  
Yep, that about explains his life right now.  
Kankuro was trapped in the Kage mansion and Suna. Everything and everyone only saw him by his rank, or by his lineage. Nope, nothing mattered to them but name and rank.  
It did not matter that he was a human being, and did not wish or need to be used by people claiming that they loved him, in order to brag about how “far they got” with Kankuro of the Sand. That happened often.  
It also didn’t matter to them that he was a shinobi, bound and set on protecting his village at the cost of his life, no matter how many times they screwed himself and his family over.  
That was saying something in itself, and yet, still nobody cared.  
At least, until she came along.  
Sure, she was only doing her job and all, but damn it, she cared. She cared that his little brother “the monster” had been captured, and even died. She cried over Chiyo’s body when she sacrificed herself to save Gaara, and she hardly even knew Chiyo! They had only met hours before!  
She cared…  
She had tended to Kankuro himself when he had almost died from Sasori’s poison. He remembered that very well. Hours had dragged on and on while pain tore through his body. Even in his sleep, he dreamt of pain. It ripped through every cell in his body. He could feel his organs slowly shutting down; he was slowly deteriorating.  
Kankuro had honestly thought he was going to die…  
…Until it all stopped.  
When he awoke, the first thing he saw was green…a beautiful, jade green. It was swimming in his mind.  
Green-The color of life, of rebirth. It was his new favorite color.  
It was also the color of her eyes. How fitting.  
She changed his life. She showed him his life could be different.  
Haruno Sakura-The medic kunoichi from Konoha.  
She was the former student of the Godaime Hokage, and she was the top kunoichi in her academy class.  
She was ridiculously smart.  
She had perfect chakra control.  
She had vibrant pink hair, and jade eyes in which you could lose yourself.  
Even with this information, he still wanted to get to know her, to befriend her.  
He wanted to be close to her.  
It looked like he was going to get the chance.  
She was to arrive in Suna tomorrow to train their medics, Kankuro remembered from the briefing earlier. Temari, Kankuro’s older sister, was to be her escort/guide around Suna, and Kankuro was to make sure both Sakura and the hospital staff behave. She had a renowned temper, Gaara had mentioned, and he wanted as little trouble as possible. Sakura was also to give her reports to Kankuro, and Kankuro was to report to Gaara from there.  
‘So basically, I’m in charge of the operation, but I tell Gaara what’s happening while Temari takes her shopping,’ Kankuro groaned, ‘Just great. So if something goes wrong, it’s my ass, not hers.’  
Although Kankuro’s mind was racing, he knew he had to try to sleep. She was going to be here tomorrow, after all, and he needed to be rested to greet her.  
He didn’t know why that frightened him, but it did.  
He didn’t understand how a girl he had only met a couple of times (and actually conversed with on an even fewer number of occasions) could affect him so. He was a shinobi; he shouldn’t be getting worked up over a kunoichi…  
…even if said kunoichi was gorgeous, and once saved him from death.  
Confused, alone, and angry at himself for being so weak, Kankuro went to bed.  
A few minutes later, after much tossing and turning, the boy finally fell into a peaceful sleep, and a content expression crossed his sleeping face. Only in his dreams was Kankuro of the Sand truly happy, and a small smile crossed his lips as an image of his green eyed angel appeared in his dreams.


	3. Meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is currently under examination for revamping. Please bear with me while changes are made, though I anticipate that any necessary changes will be minor and only serve to enhance the length and quality of earlier chapters. Later chapters have already undergone changes, as they are longer and better developed. Thank you for your patience, and thank you for reading.

“Kankuro-san, Haruno-san was due here over an hour ago-” a Suna gatekeeper began.  
“I know that,” Kankuro of the sand snarled at said gatekeeper, “People run late all the time. Stop saying it!”  
Kankuro was getting anxious. He hadn’t seen or heard from the leaf kunoichi yet, and she had been due here over an hour ago. It wasn’t like her to be late…perhaps something had happened?  
‘No,’ Kankuro’s reasoned mentally, ‘if she was in trouble she would have contacted one of our villages for assistance.’  
….but what if she had been kidnapped?  
‘Good lord, Kankuro, get a grip on yourself. She is a kunoichi, not a child. She can take care of herself.’  
Regardless of the comfort that statement brought to his mind, it didn’t quell the tightening in his chest, or slow his erratic heartbeat. Wait-tightening chest? Erratic heartbeat? What the hell was going on with him?  
Before Kankuro had the chance to consider his symptoms, however, one of his guards called out, “There’s somebody headed our direction. Everyone, eyes on the horizon, at two-o’clock!”  
Kankuro immediately whipped around and stood up a little straighter. He was her escort, after all, and he was to appear professional towards her on behalf of his village.  
Too bad he lived in the desert, or surely he would have noticed that his hands were sweatier than usual.  
Soon enough, a heavily cloaked figure (heavily cloaked to prevent sand from getting in the hair, clothes, and eyes) stood in front of the gate and slipped it’s hood back, revealing a beautiful young woman with bright jade green eyes and a mess of vibrant bubblegum pink hair. The gatekeepers asked her a few standard questions and she answered them gracefully, thus allowing them to gain her entrance into the village. As soon as her gaze shifted away from the two gatekeepers, her eyes met his. Time stood still for a moment between the two, before Kankuro recovered and quickly extended his hand with a greeting. “Welcome to Suna, Haruno Sakura.” The jounin smiled. “It’s been a while.”  
The rosette smiled gently at him, and returned his welcome with a nod and a smile. “Indeed. How are your brother and sister?” She politely asked.  
Somewhat taken aback by her immediate concern for the welfare of his siblings, it took him a moment before replying with, “They are well. Gaara wishes to speak with you, and Temari as well. Only she will wait until after you’ve spoken with my brother, of course.”  
Chuckling lightly, Sakura amusedly replied, “Hai. Lead the way, escort.” Sakura laughed lightly and punched his arm playfully.  
Kankuro was shocked even further. Not only was she teasing him, but she was accepting his family as if they were old friends! He was liking this girl more and more. She was already unlike anything he’d ever previously encountered.  
Although, admittedly, his arm wasn’t, and Kankuro now had to act like that punch hadn’t hurt at all. It seemed her reputation for her monstrous strength preceded her.

* * *

On the way to the Kazekage’s offices the two exchanged polite banter, asking about how their lives have been since they last saw each other. They talked about each other’s villages and Kankuro’s family. They even talked about his recovery and her late arrival, which was caused by a late start earlier that morning. She had stayed overnight in a small inn Kankuro was familiar with, and there had been a small scuffle there this morning; Someone had accused her of being a tramp, and Sakura “dealt” with the young man before returning on her journey, but three men-the man who’d called her a tramps’ lackeys-followed her, and she’d had to lose their tail before continuing on her way.  
“So it sounds like you had an eventful trip.” Kankuro joked, although he was inwardly filled with rage at the thought of someone calling her a tramp. She was the kindest, sweetest, most innocent person he knew. She was so far from a tramp that it was ridiculous.  
“Yeah,” Sakura giggled, “Totally eventful. Three days alone in the wilderness with no one to talk to but my backpack. Yep, it was definitely full of adventure.”  
Kankuro put on a shocked face. “You talk to your backpack?” He asked in horror, and Sakura busted out laughing.  
After taking a deep breath, Sakura blew out again and chuckled, “Oh man, I haven’t laughed like that since I saw Lee chasing Kiba around the village screaming, ‘Oh the joys of springtime youth!’. Kiba and Hinata are together now, you see, and that was Lee’s way of congratulating Kiba on asking her out. Well, Kiba just ran in the other direction and Lee went after him until Kiba threatened to burn every green piece of clothing he owned, including his jumpsuits.”  
At this, Kankuro was also laughing. “Are you serious?” He choked, trying to find a chance to breathe between laughs.  
“Yeah,” Sakura grinned, “There’s more, but I’ll tell you later.”  
Kankuro looked over at her, frowning, and asked, “Why not just tell me now?”  
Sakura looked at him, confused. “Well, isn’t that Kazekage-sama’s office building right there?” She asked perplexedly.  
Kankuro shifted his gaze away from hers to inspect a large three story dome shaped structure looming over the city. There were several windows, peering out to take in Suna, whilst simultaneously providing the citizens the tiniest opportunities to see inside as well. It was quite impressive, with its large, heavy doors and many shinobi guards were posted around its perimeter. Above the doors was an inscription for all to see, “The eyes of Suna are watching”, along with the Kazekage’s insignia below said inscription, both of which were comfortably perched above the doorway.  
Well, damn. He hadn’t even been able to hear about Lee.  
Although something nagged him in the back of his mind that it wasn’t Lee he had wished to know about.  
After Sakura’s meeting with Gaara, Kankuro was to take the kunoichi to the Kazekage’s mansion-the three sibling’s own place of residence-because she was a valued ally to Suna. Under the jurisdiction of the treaty signed between Suna and Konoha, the two villages’ shinobi were now to work together and help each other out-as every member of each village should do. As Sakura was not only a symbol of this treaty, but the highly praised medic apprentice of the lady Godaime Hokage, she was given a much higher status. It also helped greatly that she had helped to save both he and his own brother the Kazekage’s live as well. Therefore, she was to stay in their own home, as a special, high-priority guest to Suna.  
Kankuro didn’t know how he felt about that.  
Having the same woman he’d been dreaming about sleep under the same roof as he after 7 years was unsettling. He would have to get over it, however. She was a guest helping out his village, and the least he could do was show her proper respect.  
So now, as Kankuro waited outside the Kazekage’s office for Sakura’s meeting with his brother to end, Kankuro replayed their meeting over and over in his mind. She had gotten very beautiful over the years-even more so than he had last seen her, in fact. She had filled out much more-both her chest and hips were generously proportioned and her creamy skin was smooth and unblemished. Skin such as hers was uncommon for shinobi, since they were exposed to conditions civilians never had to experience. Her pink hair was still short-it seemed she had kept it that way all these years-and her eyes were still a brilliant jade green. There was something missing from them, however. The sweetness and innocence that had once been there 7 years ago had disappeared. There were worry lines on her face, and her beautiful eyes appeared happy, but only those close to her could discern otherwise. Yes, something was missing from them.  
And Kankuro wanted to find out what, for reasons he himself didn’t understand.  
After she emerged from Gaara’s office, Kankuro nodded wordlessly and motioned for her to follow him. She nodded back to show she understood, and fell in line beside him. He didn’t try to make conversation with her again, because he knew she would want to take time to consider her mission and the orders she had just received. So, naturally, when she spoke up and started talking to him again, he was surprised.  
“Kazekage-sama said you are to be my escort now full time, rather than Temari-san,” Sakura stated, and grinned at him, “Are you sure you’re up to it?”  
Kankuro scoffed, “Oh please. I’ve had enough escort missions in the past to know how women are. I don’t think you’ll be any worse than what I’ve already seen.”  
“Oh, I don’t know,” Sakura laughed, “I’ve been told I’m pretty difficult when it comes to shopping. Of course, my best friend is the one that forces me to go most of the time.” Sakura chuckled to herself, “And she practically lives with shopping bags glued to her side.”  
“That Yamanaka girl?” Kankuro asked in mock-horror, “You’re not like her, are you?”  
“NO! No, no, no,” Sakura laughed again, “I’m a lot more controlled when it comes to shopping. Besides, if I do go, I usually know exactly what I want beforehand. I don’t like to spend all my time in stores.” Sakura scowled, “I have better things to do with my time.”  
Kankuro faked a sigh of relief, which made the corners of Sakura’s lips twitch.  
“Well thank Kami,” he breathed, “I don’t think I can handle another one like that. I once had an escort mission for the Daimyo’s daughter. It should have taken us about 3 days to get to our destination, but it took us two weeks because she had to shop at every single store she saw. We started the mission with a single cart and 3 escorts, and by the time we got her safely home we made up a whole caravan.”  
At that, Sakura cracked a grin, “Well, prepare your carts then, sir. We’re going shopping.”

* * *

The volume of their chatter and laughter gradually increased until they came upon the sand siblings’ home-the Kazekage mansion. Like the other buildings in the immediate area, it was dome-shaped with many open windows, only much, much larger. There were four stories to the mansion, with a wing on each side. Each wing jutted backwards rather than forwards as most traditional buildings are made, and other than the actual building itself, the land was pretty barren. Without any plants or any other sort of vegetation, landscaping wasn’t really possible. Sand covered the ground, and with every breath of the wind it shifted. Dirt and debris flew everywhere. Although, even with all of these inconveniences, Sakura still thought it had a homey feel to it.  
“Well, this is the front entrance,” Kankuro’s voice dropped to a gruffer, professional tone, “There are others, but there are shinobi guards stationed at every door. They are always there, although they rotate in shifts, so it might not be the same person every time.”  
Leading her around to the sides and back of the mansion, he showed Sakura where everything was. Every entrance, every add-on, and she even met a few of the sentry’s. Beyond that point, Kankuro started the indoor tour.  
The first thing Sakura saw was the kitchen. Everything was high-tech and new, which was to be expected, but they had servants. Tsunade-shishou didn’t have servants because of the risk they carried. It would make it so much easier for enemy nin to get close to private information or people in general if they could play the part of a servant or maid. Therefore, she highly disapproved of keeping them. She only kept those she absolutely trusted-such as her niece, Shizune-san-close to her. That way, if someone tried to impersonate her, Tsunade-sama would absolutely be able to tell that it wasn’t her, because she had known her for so long and knew how she acted.  
Which is why it was so shocking Gaara-sa-uhh, Kazekage-sama, would keep servants; he must have really been trying more and more to trust people.  
Beyond the kitchen, Kankuro showed her all the different floors and where everything was-including their absolutely astounding library-and finally, on the 3rd floor, Kankuro showed her to her room.  
“Well, this is it,” Kankuro finally said, “Sorry for the long tour, but I wanted you to at least get the gist of where everything was. Your room is here,” he nodded to a room conveniently located in the center of the hallway, “and mine is right there at the end of the hall. We each had a floor to ourselves, until Temari moved out two years ago. Ever since then it’s just been me and Gaara. Gaara’s room is on the fourth floor, the one right above us. No one really ever goes up there, and there’s nothing up there except for spare bedrooms, which is why I didn’t take you up there.” Kankuro flashed a grin, “I didn’t think you would mind.” Pausing for a moment before continuing, he shrugged. “But seriously, Gaara likes his privacy, so we don’t bother him. Anyway, if you need anything, I’m right there,” he nodded, indicating the room at the end of the hall again, “or you can ask a guard or even Gaara, if you ever catch him at home. Your things were brought up earlier, so they should already be in there waiting for you.”  
Sakura smiled and nodded her thanks, “I’ll see you in the morning then? I mean, since you’re going to have to show me where the hospital is?”  
Kankuro nodded, “I’ll be at your door at 7:30. Don’t be late.”  
“I won’t,” Sakura promised, “Thanks again, Kankuro.”  
Kankuro nodded once again, and turned away, heading for his own bedroom. As soon as he had turned his back, Sakura turned the knob and entered her own room.  
Her heart almost stopped right then and there.  
A huge room with exquisite, expensive furnishings stared back at her, and Sakura’s inner let out a girlish squeal of delight.  
The walls were painted a deep maroon, with golden accents to the trim and curtains. A chandelier hung simply from the ceiling, and a large bed was conveniently located off to the side. A closet was on the opposite side, along with a dresser and a large body mirror. Behind the bed was the door to bathroom, which was relatively small but still extraordinarily lavish. A step-in dark brown tiled shower was in the center, with a toilet and sink on either side. The theme in here was dark tile with silver accents, and it was beautiful.  
“Kami. I may never leave.” Sakura whispered in awe, spinning in a circle in the middle of the-her-room. Eventually, once the shock wore off, she started laughing happily and fell backwards onto her new bed; arms sprawled out beside her head. She was absolutely thrilled.  
This was more than she could have asked for-a chance to help people by using her medicinal gifts in another village away from Konoha. It was like a vacation for her-going away from Konoha, but with the chance to still be able to work. She was staying in a fancy room-in the Kazekage’s mansion for Kami’s sake-and having the time of her life.  
This was going to be a good year.


	4. Getting Started

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is currently under examination for revamping. Please bear with me while changes are made, though I anticipate that any necessary changes will be minor and only serve to enhance the length and quality of earlier chapters. Later chapters have already undergone changes, as they are longer and better developed. Thank you for your patience, and thank you for reading.

 

Sakura awoke, startled by a loud thumping sound. Instantly, she sat up, alert, and looked around for her weapons pouch, which was inconveniently located on a chair opposite of her. Cursing, she leapt from her bed at a dead run, but as soon as she reached for a kunai the noise sounded once again and she recognized what it was. Someone was knocking at her door. Frowning, the kunoichi mused to herself, “But Kankuro isn’t supposed to be here until 7:30…” Instinctively, she glanced at the digital clock beside her bedside and her eyes widened with surprise. It read 7:40.

“SHIT!” the rosette screeched, as she instantly bolted toward her bathroom, snatching up her toothbrush while simultaneously reaching for her deodorant.

 

**~*~TIME SKIP~*~**

 

“Kankuro, I’m so sorry!” Sakura apologized for the umpteenth time. “I was so impressed with the room last night I collapsed on the bed and I must have forgotten to set my alarm-”

“Sakura, _enough_ ,” Kankuro replied amusedly, a hint of laughter in his eyes, “I said it was fine 15 minutes ago. Stop apologizing already.”

The two shinobi were currently making their way down a bustling Sunian main street towards Suna’s apparently discreditable hospital. While the rosette hurriedly chattered away, commenting about the buildings and the different vendors they were passing, Kankuro was reminiscing about Sakura’s hurried attempt at getting ready. He had been standing in the hall outside Sakura’s door earlier this morning and had heard her unusually loud cursing through her door. While he had waited there for her patiently, he had had a really difficult time of containing his amusement. It was obvious that Sakura had awoken later than she had expected, despite her attempt at trying to convince him otherwise. When she had opened her door and walked into the hallway with a bright smile and confident stride, she was still wearing her silky pajama top. Kankuro had had to will himself pretty strongly not to laugh at that. With a miraculous amount of effort, he had somehow managed to calmly point out that she might have to change shirts, despite the fact that he himself didn’t mind. This effectively silenced her claims of being “ready to go” as she had so put it, as an angered expression appeared on her face at his perverseness. Still angered, she managed to glance down to see what she was wearing, and her expression quickly changed to one of utter horror. The rosette made a noise somewhere between a growl of annoyance and a “Meep!” of surprise, and turned and strode back into her room; another stream of curses soon following.

A single phrase soon brought the sand jounin out of his thoughts, interrupting his train of thought. 

“I really am sorry-” the rosette interjected.

“Sakura,” Kankuro said firmly, “I’m honestly tired of discussing this. You have nothing to be sorry for. Now quit apologizing or I’m liable to get angry at you.” The sand shinobi stated, maintaining a serious tone, but somehow simultaneously managed to make it slightly teasing. 

“I’m sorr-” the rosette started instinctively, but caught herself and immediately snapped her mouth shut. Kankuro shot her a warning look, but said nothing. After that, the conversation became non-existent, and they continued walking on in silence.

After a few minutes, the silence became almost painful for the both of them, and they both started,

“So-”

“How-”

Silence immediately followed. Surprised, they both exchanged glances and continued,

“What were you-?”

“You-”

They both stopped walking and turned toward each other, looking at each other questioningly. Sakura gave her escort a light chuckle and said, “You first.” Kankuro smirked and replied, “Alright. I was just going to ask you how you like your room.” He phrased his response tentatively, ending the sentence with an unspoken question.

Sakura’s responding smile was huge. “I love it. When I walked in there, it felt like I was…important. The room is huge, and so lavishly decorated, and I loved the bathroom fixtures, and-” She broke off, her expression suddenly sheepish. “I’m sorry,” she apologized, “I’m just not used to all the special treatment, and-”

As soon as she had apologized, Kankuro had sent her an obvious pointed glare, reminding her of their former “agreement”. She only caught this halfway through her rant, but when she finally glanced up at his irritated expression she quickly silenced herself, and effectively cut herself off mid-sentence.

“What,” Kankuro growled, “did I _just_ tell you about apologizing to me?”

Their arguing increased both in intensity and volume as they continued, growing ever closer to Suna’s medical hospital. Soon enough, Kankuro and Sakura’s shrill protests had drawn the attention of Suna’s citizens. They looked at the sand jounin and the rosette next to him with a great amount of curiosity-they had never seen the middle sand sibling this taken with a woman before. Granted, he would talk to them-and plenty of them-but never for this long, even if he was arguing with them. He would usually only talk with them long enough to earn their trust and to “get what he wanted from them”, and he had never talked to the same girl two days in a row. Not once. Yet he had been seen hanging around with this leaf medic for several days now.

Curious. Very curious, the Sunian people mused.

 

* * *

 

**TIME SKIP: 2 WEEKS LATER**

 

It’s true what they say about time flying when you’re having fun, but the opposite is just brutally and unbearably true as well. Whether you’re waiting on a certain given moment or just bored and hoping time will soon pass, the hands on the clock are virtually at a standstill.

As Sakura pondered that old saying, she also considered the value of time. In 10 minutes, Sakura Haruno can heal a broken leg or arm or successfully diagnose a walk-in patient in the clinic. She can set a cast or fully bandage a person’s entire torso and prep them for major surgery. She can even fire a doctor or two, sign the papers, and still have the time to box up their belongings and punch them out the front doors. However, the one thing she could _not_ do is stare at the clock mounted above her doorway for another second!

Angrily, Sakura huffed at herself. She knew, she _knew_ she shouldn’t have given the pediatric records to the OB nurses, because now she didn’t have any work to do! ‘Damn it,’ Sakura growled internally, ‘Now what am I supposed to do?’

Yes, it’s true. Sakura Haruno had officially worked herself to the bone…and apparently still had meat enough to spare. It was almost laughable, actually, and-if you really thought about it-predictable. As we all know, Sakura is a workaholic, and as such is constantly working on something. There comes a time, however, when there simply isn’t any more work left to do, and Sakura had somehow managed it for the day…

…with 10 minutes left to spare.

Anyone else in this given situation would have happily picked up their coats and skipped out the door whistling a happy tune…happy- _grateful_ , even-that they could leave work early after a job well done. Yet, Sakura is a workaholic, as already mentioned, and is very…abnormal…in that sense.

So, with her not-so-natural refusal to leave work early, Sakura was posed with very few options. She could A) pick up around her office or B) walk downstairs to yell at some more people.

Funny. Has Sakura ever mentioned that she hates cleaning of any kind?

Removing herself from her office, Sakura quickly made her way down the hall, a mischievous smirk apparent on her face. She was mapping out the route she would take in her mind: first, she would head to the 3rd floor-maternity ward. After checking up on the nurses there, she would see if the obstetric doctors were progressing on the procedures she had just taught them this morning. Then, she would continue down to the 2nd floor to the ICU, and make sure the idiots weren’t still using water to wash off the blood on victims cuts-honestly, haven’t they ever _heard_ of disinfectants? Or, you know, infections at all, for that matter? Then she would continue on to the first floor surgical areas and monitor a couple of procedures…

A hard body bumped into her at that moment, halting her steps and interrupting her train of thought. Annoyed, Sakura looked up, only to find the middle sand sibling staring down at her, with an eyebrow raised and an amused smirk on his face.

Sakura’s eyes narrowed with annoyance. “Kankuro-san,” she started, “what are you doing here?”

Kankuro feigned a hurt expression. “I’m shocked, Sakura-san,” he continued, a frown evident on his face, “I didn’t know you didn’t want me around…” He trailed off, apparently still hurt. The melancholy expression on his face appeared so genuine-if Sakura hadn’t known Kankuro the way she did then she would not have known he was faking. Still, she was tired of his games, and replied, “Cut the crap Kankuro, seriously. Now what do you need?”

The male maintained a stoic facial expression, although a flash of something Sakura couldn’t identify briefly flickered in his eyes before disappearing. “Jeez Sakura,” Kankuro snapped, anger lacing his tone, “I’m here to escort you home. And to take you to dinner, since neither myself nor Gaara will be home tonight, and the servants have been notified not to make our meals.”

Embarrassed and ashamed of herself, Sakura apologized. “I’m sorry, Kankuro. I had no right to snap at you,” she sighed, “thank you for coming.” She smiled. “Really. I appreciate it, and I didn’t mean what I said before.”

As quickly as it had appeared, the annoyance and anger on Kankuro’s face had disappeared, and his former cheer was for the most part restored. “Alright then,” he happily declared, “Are you ready to go?”

Sakura thought back to her former plans; nothing seemed important enough that it needed to be done right now-the terrorizing the staff part, especially. If anything, delaying it until tomorrow would give Sakura more time tomorrow to mess with them. A mischievous grin once again found its way onto the rosette’s face.

Kankuro, not oblivious to her change in mood, took note of her expression. “Whoever it is that has that look directed towards them,” Kankuro carefully stated, “then I _so_ do not want to be them at this moment.” Kankuro put on a brave front, but secretly he was hoping that she was not thinking of him while wearing that smirk. He had a feeling some form of torture would result from it, and it wouldn’t be pretty.

By this time, the two had made their way outside of the hospital building, and Sakura had steadily grown more curious about where the two were headed. “Where are we going, Kankuro?” She asked, only to be met with silence. “Kankuro?” she repeated.

More silence.

“Kankuro!” Sakura angrily exclaimed, “You have until the count of three to answer me, or-”

The sound of Kankuro’s rumbling laughter cut off the rest of her sentence, and for some strange reason Sakura couldn’t be mad at his stupidity. Instead, she found herself chuckling with him. However, when he finally came to a stop and turned to face her, a grin on his face, she couldn’t resist the urge to punch him-hard-in the shoulder.

“OWWW!” The Sand jounin whined, “Sakura, what was that for?”

“For being stupid,” Sakura stated, fighting to keep a straight face at his childishness.“Now _as_ I was saying,” she started, “ _where_ are we going?” She folded her arms across her chest in a stubborn move, refusing to budge until he gave her the information she wanted.

“Just around the corner,” Kankuro finally answered, “It’s one of my favorite places, and I figured you would like it.” Rubbing his shoulder where she had punched him, he frowned. “Damn Sakura,” he whined again, “that really hurt.”

Barely holding back a wicked grin, Sakura challenged, “Good. Now maybe you’ll know better than to mess with me.”

Kankuro opened his mouth as if to reply, but almost immediately closed it as if he had thought better of it. Shrugging, Kankuro instead replied, “Whatever you say, Sakura.” After a few more feet the burly middle sand sibling stopped in his tracks and announced, “We’re here.”

Sakura looked upwards at the simple dome-shaped restaurant. It was exactly the same as the other buildings in the vicinity, except that there was a sign in the doorway that advertised the business’s name and the specials for the day. It looked simple enough; there were no flashing signs or advertisements on the walls like you would find in Konoha, but, Sakura supposed, when their walls were made out of sand they couldn’t exactly do half the things that Konoha business owners could. Upon entering the restaurant, Kankuro led them to a booth towards the back. Sakura was surprised to see it didn’t have very many places to sit. Rather than being a large business, it was a rather cozy place to be-contrary to what she had thought Kankuro would prefer.

Well, wasn’t he just full of surprises?

After seeing the look on her face, Kankuro chuckled. “I’ve loved this place since I was little. It’s one of my best memories of my father. He took me here a couple of times when he had time off work, which was rare. Temari almost always went with us. Gaara would stay at home-he was much too young to be out in public yet; that’s my father told us,” Kankuro smiled sadly, “I had no idea, even at such a young age, of what my father was plotting, or doing to Gaara. Temari didn’t either, or we wouldn’t have allowed it to happen. Even though he was the Kazekage, we still could have done something for Gaara, rather than stand by in fear and watch everything happen. I guess it’s true what they say, though. Ignorance is bliss.” Kankuro reached across the table and grabbed a couple of pre-placed menus, handing one to Sakura.

Surprised at Kankuro’s sudden and almost intimate revealing of himself, Sakura felt the need to reassure the puppet master. “Kankuro,” she started, “What happened to Gaara-it wasn’t Temari’s or your fault. You two couldn’t have done anything to stop it even if you tried-”

“The Yakitori here is great, if you want to try it.” Kankuro interrupted and immediately went silent thereafter, studying his menu.

It was then that Sakura knew that Kankuro blamed himself for Gaara’s hardships. ‘He is so hard on himself,’ Sakura thought to herself, ‘He has to know that he couldn’t have done anything about Gaara’s situation at so young an age, yet he insists on shouldering the blame. Why, though?’ Sakura questioned herself as she watched him order. She was so deep in thought she didn’t hear the waitress ask her for her order until Kankuro nudged her on the shoulder and she absentmindedly ordered the first thing on the menu. She didn’t miss the waitress’s attempted sexy wink at Kankuro as she left, though. The action made Sakura scowl.

Inwardly laughing, Kankuro watched as Sakura shot the waitress a dirty look after she had left the table. She truly was different, Sakura was. She wasn’t like the other girls-she was more mature and serious. Sakura wasn’t the type to mess around, and Kankuro could easily tell that from her work ethic. She worked non-stop. From dawn to dusk she was at the hospital, and when she finally returned to the Kage’s mansion she always stayed up late with paperwork spread out all over her bed, the lamp on her desk forever providing light. For this reason, Gaara had asked him to take her out tonight. She was working all the time, and Gaara didn’t want her to wear herself out. She was a guest of Suna, after all, and she “Needs to take a break before she has a nervous breakdown”, as his Kazekage had said. Kankuro resisted the urge to snort. He knew what Gaara was really up to. He was just trying to get Kankuro and Sakura out of the house so they wouldn’t notice his absence for the night. Gaara was probably doing something with Matsuri again, and didn’t want anyone to bother them. “Eh, Whatever. More power to him.” Kankuro shrugged, and finally came out of his thoughts. He didn’t realize that he had said that out loud until he had heard Sakura’s question of “What are you talking about?”

“Eh heh heh,” Kankuro sweat dropped, and rubbed the back of his neck with his hand in an embarrassed move, “Nothing, Sakura. So how’s work?” He asked, hoping to change the subject. While he was sure she knew he was deflecting, he wasn’t really in the mood to divulge information about his little brother’s love life. And even if he was, he didn’t particularly want to die by his little brother’s hand.

“It’s fine, I guess.” Sakura suspiciously eyed him, before playing along with his conversation change. “I’ve been pretty busy, but we’re making a lot of progress,” she beamed, “many of your medics here have potential and a great amount of talent. I can’t wait until we get started with the more difficult procedures-it’s going to be exciting to see what they can do! First I think we’ll start with procedures like Cricothyrotomies, and then we’ll move on to the more common ones.Appendectomies, C-sections, Tonsillectomies, Vasectomies…”

“W-O-W! Okay, okay! I get it,” Kankuro loudly interrupted, cutting her off before he could get more uncomfortable than he already was. Thinking about vasectomies was not something a man wanted to do before he ate his dinner; he could lose his appetite rather quickly. Before she could say anything else he interjected, “I take it you love your job, then, huh?”

“Yes!” The rosette practically squealed. “I love the fact that I’m helping people get better, and that I’m making a difference in people’s lives. The only part I don’t like, is, well…” she cut herself off and paused for a few moments as if to consider her words, before quietly finishing, “when I lose someone. Then it’s like I failed them…both my patients and their families and friends. I have a responsibility being the doctor, and then I have to inform the families when they pass away or that they’re not going to make it or that there’s nothing more we can do,” she tiredly buried her face in her hands, “it’s the worst feeling in the world, because then you feel incredibly powerless-like nothing you do is ever going to make the world change or them get any better. So you have to just sit there and watch them fade away until all that’s left is a memory.”

With the mood between the two officially sour, neither knew what to say to the other, so they settled on sitting in silence until their food arrived. When it did, the two happily dug in to their dishes almost ravenously, and Sakura found that Kankuro wasn’t kidding when he said the Yakitori was delicious. She practically tore into her food; she hadn’t eaten since breakfast. When she stopped for a moment, though, and looked up to gaze at Kankuro’s plate (he was eating something American-a cheeseburger and fries, she thought she’d heard him say when he had ordered), she couldn’t stop the laugh that bubbled up through her lips.Kankuro stopped his eating, with a fry handing out of the side of his mouth. “What?” he asked, after he had hurriedly devoured the rest of his fry. “Did I get something on my face?” He took his hand and wiped it across his mouth, trying to wipe off a non-existent food item. This only increased Sakura’s near-hysterical laughter and it only made Kankuro more self-conscious. “Sakura, really,” the sand shinobi whined, “what is it?”

Sakura held her hands wrapped around her stomach-she was laughing so hard-and she took several deep breaths, trying to calm herself down. Finally, she managed, “You looked like a starving animal, scarfing down that food. Sorry,” she apologized, seeing the hurt look on his face, “I’m not saying that in an insulting way. It was actually…kind of cute.” She grinned.

“Hn. Really?” Kankuro smirked, “Then get used to it, because I’m going to start eating like that all the time, just for you. Chicken? I’ll eat it with my fingers.Fries?” He held up a fry in front of him, demonstrating what it was at her look of confusion. “I’ll suck them off the plate.” He set said fry down on his plate, bent his head over it, and sucked in a tremendous amount of air before it went into his mouth. After seeing Sakura burst out laughing again, his grin grew even wider and he continued, “Ramen? Psh. I have no need for chopsticks anymore, because Sakura, you’ve just given me permission to face-bowl that bitch!”

Sakura was now doubled over, her head sticking outside of the booth and hanging out in the aisle. The two were now making enough noise that the restaurant’s patrons were now watching the two-especially Kankuro’s obscene and vulgar eating habits. The younger children were laughing at the two, trying to mimic Kankuro, while their parents frantically lectured them to eat their food properly and to put their plates down. The elderly customers of the restaurant merely shook their heads and sternly muttered “Kids these days”, while continuing with their own meals.

Soon enough, the two had finally calmed down enough to start eating again, but as soon as they had taken another bite, the store’s manager had come to stand at the edge of their table. “Excuse me, sir. Madam,” he nodded at Sakura, “I’m going to have to ask you to leave. The other customers’ are…uncomfortable…with your behavior, and I’ve had several complaints in the past few minutes. It’s nothing personal, Kankuro-sama,” the man bowed to Kankuro, “the two of you may come back at any time. It’s just not good for business for you to stay.” The man gave them an apologetic look.

“Nah, that’s okay Jiro-san,” Kankuro addressed the man, and resisted the urge to laugh. He wiggled his eyebrows at Sakura to try to ease some of her embarrassment, “We’ll go. But do you think we can have some boxes to take our food home with?”

* * *

Laughing, the two made their way away from the restaurant, to-go boxes in their hands. “Oh my God,” Sakura breathed, “That was so fun. It was embarrassing to have to have been thrown out though.” She laughed again. “I’ve never been thrown out of anywhere before. You must be a bad influence, Kankuro.” She shot him a teasing grin.

“Oh yeah, that’s it,” Kankuro snorted, “You better stay away from me, Sakura…Now it’s all fun and games and getting thrown out of restaurants, but tomorrow you could be wrapped up in my illegal drug trade…whoops!” Kankuro pretended to cover his mouth in horror after she started laughing at his illegal drug trade comment.

“Drug-trade, eh?” Sakura laughed, “I’d have thought you were a pimp or something-in charge of Suna’s prostitution ring.”

At that, the two kept on joking, prodding at each other back and forth, until Kankuro and Sakura had finally returned to the Kage mansion.

‘Oh crap,’ Kankuro thought to himself, ‘we weren’t supposed to come home for a while…’

“Hey Sakura,” Kankuro started uneasily, “Uh…we technically aren’t supposed to be home yet, so do you want to eat in the basement? That way we can stay out of their-err-Gaara’s way. He’s a little busy tonight, and that’s why he wanted me to take you out to dinner. He’s entertaining guests tonight.”

“I see,” Sakura replied, and eyed him suspiciously, “Well then, I suppose we can.” She smiled, and almost immediately her smile grew into a mischievous smirk. “We’ll leave Gaara and Matsuri alone…for now.”

Startled at her knowledge about his little brothers romantic life, Kankuro decided not to ever let her into his own personal affairs. Rather than press the matter, which he knew would only end in many prying questions on her part, he decided to just grunt his agreement. Making sure they hadn’t been seen, they stealthily made their way around the house, and snuck in through the darkened back door. After stepping through the threshold and seeing no movement within the shadows, they crawled through the darkened kitchen silently. Turning into the hallway, they looked swiftly to their left and saw no one, but on quick inspection to the right, they saw two guards posted outside the dining room door-a sure sign that Gaara was in there. Another clue alerting the two to the Kage’s presence was the muffled sound of laughter and voices coming from the room. With a muted curse, Kankuro pressed both Sakura and himself back into the wall and motioned for her to go back into the kitchen.

“What are we going to do now?” Sakura hissed. She had no desire to die by the Kazekage’s hand, especially when she was on an ambassadorial mission. Talk about an embarrassing report that will reach Tsunade-sama if she would get caught; Sakura would never live that down.

“We’ll have to go the other way around,” Kankuro whispered, “we’ll have to be careful though. I mean it Sakura; if we get caught he’s going to make my life a living hell…”

“He’ll make _your_ life a living hell?” Sakura growled, “What about mine-”

“Yeah yeah, yours too,” Kankuro hurriedly explained, keeping an eye on the guards at the dining room door, and making sure they hadn’t moved yet, “But it’ll be 1,000 times worse for me, trust me.”

* * *

 

The two were laughing, the now empty boxes that had contained their dinner were spread open at their feet. They were now in the basement, and stretched out with several blankets and pillows that had come from the empty chest in the corner of the room. The two weren’t lying together-but there was only a few feet of space between where they lay with their own separate covers. Sakura smiled, propping her head upon her hand, her elbow supporting its weight on the floor. “I don’t know how we managed to get down here,” Sakura snickered, “but this is somewhat fun. We should do this more often,” she giggled.

Kankuro snorted, “Yeah, definitely. We should sneak in my own house more often, whilst simultaneously avoiding my all-powerful younger brother, who could throw us in jail for the stupidest made-up offense if we get caught. What a thrill!”

Sakura turned her head into her pillow to suppress her laughter. Kankuro just smiled at her childish display and rolled over onto his back, staring towards the ceiling.

After Sakura caught her breath, she caught Kankuro’s expression as he stared up at the ceiling. “What’s wrong, Kankuro?” She asked, concern lacing her tone. She shifted her body until she faced him fully, giving him her full attention.

“Nothing, Sakura, I was just thinking; This is the most fun I’ve had in…well…ever. So I guess I’m saying thank you for hanging out with me tonight, Sakura.” He smiled, and she thought she saw something flicker in his eyes before it disappeared almost instantly. “It means a lot to me.”

“Hey, not a problem,” Sakura smiled, “I’ve actually had more fun in the past few hours than I’ve allowed myself to have since-” She broke off, “well, since about 6 years ago, actually. So I guess I owe you a big thank you too.” With a happy grin, she rolled back over onto her stomach and curled up under her own covers. She turned her head to face away from Kankuro as she rested it on its side, and muttered an appreciative, “Good night Kankuro” before closing her eyes.

“Hey, Sakura, wait-” Kankuro almost agitatedly answered, and reached out to roll her back over to where she was facing him.

Groggily, she answered, “What Kankuro? I’m tired…” Her hair was now just ever so slightly messed up from where she had lain on the pillow, and she really did look tired. They had been up for several hours talking, and it was late, Kankuro knew, but he just wasn’t ready for her to fall asleep yet. He wanted to talk to her more.

“I know, Sakura, and I’m sorry, but…” he trailed off, and his gaze landed on her pale pink lips. They looked so delicious and plump, and the only thing he wanted to do at that moment was lean in and capture them with his own…

…and right at that moment, the basement door flew open, and the next thing they knew both Matsuri and the Godaime Kazekage himself were standing at the top of the basement stairs.

“Oh,” Matsuri’s hands flew to her mouth in shock and embarrassment after seeing the two wrapped up in pillows and blankets on the floor. Suddenly she felt very uneasy, and with the realization that she was caught in a very embarrassing situation herself, her legs gave out and she started to fall backwards. Of course, Gaara caught her and helped her stand back up, keeping his arms wrapped around her for support. Turning his gaze to meet his older brothers’, he kept his face stoic, but managed to convey to him a message that only had a small hint of anger in it. “Kankuro,” the younger sand sibling called out, “I need to have a word with you upstairs for a moment.”

Kankuro resisted the urge to bury his face in his pillow and beat his fists on the ground. ‘SHIT!’ his mind cursed. This was SO not good…and Sakura was an ambassador, too…she could get in trouble…

Steadily, Kankuro got to his feet and walked up the stairs to where his brother and Matsuri were standing. With a quick nod to the female, he motioned for Gaara to lead the way out of the basement. Sakura remained downstairs, smothering her beet-red face into her pillow.

After the two boys had shut the basement door behind them, Matsuri managed to catch her breath and breathe again. When she looked down the stairs, she could see Sakura curled up, her head buried in her pillow in embarrassment, and even Matsuri couldn’t help but reassure her.

“Sakura?” the young kunoichi timidly questioned, “Are you okay?”

Sakura barely lifted her head from her pillow and feebly managed, “Yeah, I’m just great Matsuri, thanks.”

Matsuri actually had to resist the urge to giggle when Sakura stood up and wearily gazed at the Kazekage’s younger student. She looked like she’d had a heck of a night. After her giddiness subsided, though, the brunette gazed down at the pink-haired woman and frowned. “Wait,” Matsuri exclaimed in confusion, “You’re…still dressed? So you and Kankuro didn’t-”

“NO!” Sakura said forcefully. Upon seeing the frightened look on the younger girl’s face, however, the rosette sighed and said, “Sorry. This just isn’t the best scenario to be in.”

At this, Matsuri merely raised her eyebrows at Sakura, which caused the rosette to almost- _almost-_ laugh.

“Oh,” Sakura smiled, “Right. I guess we’re in the same boat, then.”

Matsuri actually laughed at that. “Yeah,” she grinned, “I guess we are.”

* * *

 

“I should have known that it was you,” Gaara started, “I was informed that my brother was acting foolishly at Ichiro’s restaurant tonight, but I never expected it to escalate to this! She’s an ambassador here _on a mission_ from one of our allied nations, and you’re _sleeping around with her_ like one of your common-”

“Enough, Gaara!” Kankuro heatedly argued. “I have not done anything with Sakura. Nor would I ever put her in a situation that would question her honor.”

At that Gaara snorted. Yes, Gaara of the sand actually _snorted_!

“Really?” Gaara questioned, skepticism written all over his face, “should I tell that to the rest of those girls that you’ve brought in here to have a romp with and then left at dawn’s first light?”

“You,” Kankuro fumed, barely managing to control his anger, “ _Really_ need to learn your place, Gaara. As if you have any reason to lecture me about inappropriate relationships! What about you and Matsuri, huh? And how many times have you slept with _her_?”

Suddenly, Kankuro found himself with his back shoved against the wall, and his little brothers’ hands on his throat. “Don’t,” Gaara spat, “Bring Matsuri into this. If you want to live, Kankuro, then don’t.”

“Why not?” Kankuro rasped, “It’s the same thing. You just need to realize what you’re doing before she gets hurt again.”

At that, Gaara dropped his hands from his brothers’ throat, his eyes vacant from being lost in thought. Kankuro took this opportunity to massage his throat with his hands tenderly, trying to soothe the pain surrounding his neck. 

“I have thought of that many times,” Gaara started, “Yet I cannot seem to keep myself away from her. I think-” he cut himself off, as if afraid to finish his original sentence, and then finally settled with, “I think she is important to me.”

“If she’s so important to you,” Kankuro said, “Then why do you drag her around like this all the time? You even threw me and Sakura out of the house in an attempt to hide her, when we-everyone-already knows. You are trying to hide your relationship, and by doing so are failing miserably.”

Gaara bowed his head in defeat. “I am aware of that,” Gaara admitted, “But I still cannot stop seeing her. My mind says to stop, in order to save her from the threats and the trouble,” he fisted his hand, and brought it up to his chest, “but this is what my heart says, here-to keep her there and to never let her go.”

Kankuro smiled, genuinely happy for his little brother, and put his hand on Gaara’s shoulder. “I’m glad, Gaara. I really am happy that you have found someone to make you this happy. Yet, I’m a little disappointed that you seem to think of Sakura and me as this big of a threat to your relationship with Matsuri.” Gaara looked up, startled, and Kankuro continued, “Oh, don’t play dumb with me, Gaara. You blew up when you saw the two of us downstairs, which, by the way, we weren’t doing anything but eating dinner and talking.” Kankuro sternly finished.

Gaara gave Kankuro a crooked smile, “I am aware of that,” he said simply.

“What?” Kankuro practically yelled, “Then why did you-”

“To mess with you,” Gaara shrugged, “and to warn you to behave yourself. She may be your friend, but she is still a guest medical ninja here to help our own program. If you develop a serious relationship with her, or even have a fling, that affects both of our nations.”

“I am aware of that, Gaara,” Kankuro sighed.

“I know,” Gaara nodded, “and I understand that. Still, Kankuro, behave. I don’t relish the fact I have to remind my older brother of this.”

Sighing, Kankuro decided to nod his acceptance rather than continue to press the matter. It was just easier that way.

With a final nod, Gaara turned on his heel and strode back to the basement door. He kept moving with a certainty in his stride until he stopped at the door and placed his hand on the knob. He turned to face Kankuro, his gaze positioned at the floor, and muttered out of the corner of his mouth, “Oh, and by the way, Kankuro. I didn’t see anything if you didn’t.” With that the redhead opened the closet door, turned, and disappeared into the basement, leaving a dumbfounded puppet master in his tracks.

* * *

 

It had only been a few agonizing, painful moments since Sakura and Kankuro had been caught in the basement together, and Sakura didn’t know if she should worry about being caught or not. After Gaara had collected Matsuri and took her to another room in the mansion (Sakura could only guess where…that mansion was huge!), Kankuro had helped Sakura clean up the food boxes and put away the pillows and blankets on which they had lain. He was silent the entire time, and his expression was vacant-his thoughts had been drifting elsewhere. Sakura knew that he probably needed time to think through whatever he was considering, but she didn’t want it to be that moment. She was still there, after all, and Sakura didn’t like being ignored. 

So when the two of them made their way silently up the stairs, and right before Kankuro opened the basement’s door, Sakura asked him, “Kankuro, what’s wrong? Are you in trouble?”

Kankuro, finally coming out of his daze, sheepishly replied, “Honestly? I don’t know. But I suppose I’ll soon find out.”

After that, he fell silent again, and Sakura knew that was probably what had been worrying him. She felt unsettled by this realization. Surely if she hadn’t been there with him, he wouldn’t be in trouble. If she hadn’t been hanging out with him, they wouldn’t have been thrown out of that restaurant and caught in the compromising situation in which they had been. She knew she shouldn’t have felt guilty-Kankuro had confessed that it had been the most fun he had had in a long time, and she felt the same way, but now he was in trouble and he was worried about it. She felt terrible about it.

They were passing through the library at this point-the same library that never ceased to amaze the pinkette. She had always been impressed with the many mountains of books that were stored in this very room, and she smiled in spite of herself. She absolutely _had_ to take a day off one of these days and curl up on one of the chairs in the corner and read…

Her gaze drifted to the many different sections of books in the Sand Sibling’s collection, and while many of them didn’t surprise her, some of them did. Especially the collection of books entitled “Romantic Fiction”.

She resisted the urge to snort. Which of the three siblings would read that?

As they passed by the shelves of the said collection, the copies, sure enough, were indeed battered and strewn about. They had been taken care of, sure, but someone had put them away in a hurry, and some were even stacked on top of the neatly arranged horizontal rows of books, indicating they had been picked up and returned in a bit of a hurry. Sakura was suddenly puzzled. Someone _was_ reading cheesy romances, and since she hadn’t had a chance to raid them yet, it had to have been one of the three siblings-but whom?

She hadn’t had much time to ponder the thought, though, because Kankuro was now leading her out of the enormous library, and back into one of the many hallways adorning the mansion. They stepped into the dimly lit hallway, and Kankuro suddenly spoke, “You’re awfully quiet, Sakura. Are you okay?” His tone was tinged with concern.

Sakura, suddenly abashed, quickly answered, “Sorry Kankuro. I’m fine, just thinking.”

Kankuro’s hand subconsciously moved toward hers, but he violently yanked it away before she would notice-or so he had hoped. His hand had brushed hers for a moment there. If she had noticed it, though, she gave no indication. She was still looking ahead, her expression set into a faraway gaze. He fumbled to cover up his uncharacteristic reaction to her words, and eventually managed, “What are you thinking about, then? You look like you’re pretty far away.” He turned his gaze toward her, a smirk firmly planted on his face. Inwardly, however, he was silently and frantically praying that he wasn’t freaking her out.

Sakura shrugged and answered, “Eh, you know. What I’m going to do tomorrow at work, what happened at the restaurant earlier, what happened with Gaara and Matsuri-why are they trying to hide their relationship, anyway? It’s pretty obvious that they like each other…” Instantly and reluctantly, her thoughts drifted to a moment ago when she felt Kankuro’s hand brushing against her own. What had that been about?

Sakura quickly decided she didn’t want to know, and banished the thought from her head. ‘ _Focus on the present_ ,’ she reminded herself, ‘ _don’t worry about the past_.’ It had been one of the first things she had learned from Kakashi-sensei. Sure, you should never forget the past-she had witnessed her distraught sensei at the Leaf’s memorial stone more than enough times to understand that lesson-but there was another lesson within watching him repeat that same action. If you dwell on the past-on things you couldn’t change-they will consume you. Therefore it was better to concentrate on the time you had left, rather than that which you have lost.

Her thoughts moved to this past evening, and, in fact, it truthfully had been one of the best she had had in a long time. She had Kankuro to thank for that-and Kankuro alone. He had made her laugh, and he had taken her out tonight. They had snuck into his own home, and been thrown out of a restaurant-behavior Sakura would have never dreamed about prior to tonight. It seemed that Kankuro really was bringing out another side of her.

And that scared the pink-haired leaf kunoichi.

What was she to do now? Hanging out with Kankuro was changing her-and the very definition that she held of herself. She was the Hokage’s apprentice-a good, loyal, well-behaved kunoichi who never did any wrong and was a good example for people everywhere. Now here she was hanging around none of than the Kazekage’s brother, and getting thrown out of places, wreaking havoc and causing trouble- _and she was on an ambassadorial mission_. So shouldn’t she be feeling even the _slightest_ bit ashamed of herself? Maybe the other part of her was, but why wasn’t she now?

When Kankuro had brushed his hand against hers a moment ago, why had it sent shocks of pleasure throughout her body? Why does his presence around her make her feel warm and fuzzy, the exact opposite of what she _should_ feel?

Sakura had a theory-a horrible, nasty, potentially career-ending theory. Was she attracted to Kankuro of the Sand- a much older jounin, a _Sand_ ninja, and _brother to the kazekage_? As Sakura mulled this thought over, she quickly realized she had already known the answer.

She was.

She was attracted to him-and worse than that, she… _liked_ him.

The more logical side of her resisted the urge to beat her head repeatedly against the wall. How stupid could she get? Although she had yet to know the details of his previous “relationships”, she could take a pretty accurate guess. Just judging by the way he acted, and the way the other girls in the village looked at him-some with lust, some with a scorned hatred-he was not exactly the best boyfriend material. This was bound to end in disaster...

…exactly as it had 6 years ago. Sakura couldn’t prevent her head from ducking down. Luckily Kankuro didn’t notice, though. He was still busy going on about Gaara and Matsuri. It was a good thing that he was still talking, or he would have noticed her misery. Six years ago was when she had confessed her feelings to Sasuke, and on top of denying her feelings, he knocked her out and left her on a bench, taking the opportunity to make off into the night and defect from their village.

Not that she thought Kankuro would ever do that sort of thing, but Sakura was petrified. Ever since that incident, she had been afraid-deeply afraid-of letting anyone that close ever again. She had learned from that rejection-and from that incident-that it wasn’t worth the hurt to go through that again. Thus, she was afraid of going through that level of heartbreak again. What was she to do now? Did Kankuro honestly return her feelings? Just what was she to him? Was she someone who he would want a serious relationship with? Or did he just want a romp in the sack?

Sakura resisted the urge to panic. This was Kankuro…she _knows_ him, and she knows how he is. She knew that however he may act with the other girls; he wouldn’t jeopardize the alliance between their two villages for nothing. He wouldn’t want to just sleep with her and risk both of their jobs for nothing…right?

Right.

So therefore, Sakura made the decision to trust him…for now.

By this time, they had made their way to the 3rd floor-to their rooms-and Kankuro had stopped with Sakura at her door. He awkwardly shifted his weight onto his other leg, and he casually shrugged his shoulders and slipped his hands in his pockets. “Thanks for hanging out with me tonight, Sakura,” he grinned, “I had fun tonight. Really.”

Sakura returned his grin with a smile, “Me too Kankuro. And thank you for showing me around, too.” She ran a hand distractedly through her hair, and she glanced at her door. Suddenly, the fatigue in her expression was apparent, and it alerted Kankuro to just how late it was. It had to have been about one in the morning already. Still, he couldn’t help but think to himself how cute she looked like that. Even though she was tired, with her hair all messed up from running her fingers through it, he could still see the cherry tint to her lips, and the way her eyes shined. She was beautiful.

And without fully knowing it or understanding why he did it, he took a couple of steps and closed the distance between them. He wrapped his right hand around her waist and pulled her flush against him-there was no space in between them. Her breasts were pressed against his chest, and he resisted the urge to groan with satisfaction. Her eyes grew wide and she only had the chance to gasp out, “Kankuro, what-” before he brought both hands up to cup her face and hungrily pressed his lips to hers in a passionate and fierce kiss.

Sakura was conflicted only for a moment before she automatically melted into his kiss. She brought her right hand up, knocking off his hood and running her fingers through his thick brown hair. She wrapped her other arm around his neck, pulling him deeper into the kiss, and they both moaned, each taking pleasure in the feel of the other. Instinctively, he pushed his lower half into hers, and she could feel his already rapidly hardening member through their layers of clothing. Groans erupted from the contact, and he pressed his lips to hers even harder, if possible. The kiss soon turned to one of pure lust, and the two were fiercely combating each other over control of the kiss. Sakura licked his bottom lip for permission and he obliged, but soon took over. They were battling for control, each wanting to taste the other, and unsurprisingly Kankuro won. Suddenly, Sakura pulled away to breathe, and Kankuro finally came to his senses; he had finally realized what he had been doing. He gasped in shock, his eyes widened, and he instantly stepped back, putting space in between the two again. He frantically tried to apologize, barely managing, “Sorry, Sakura…I…didn’t…I…have to…Night!” He quickly turned around and quickly walked back to his room. He fumbled for the key he kept in his pocket, and hurriedly unlocked the door. He couldn’t step into his room, though, because Sakura was still standing in front of her door in a dazed state, her lips swollen from his kisses, and still trying to regain her breath. As he took in the exhausted, confused kunoichi, something happened that had never happened with any other woman before. His heart melted.

“Aw hell,” he grumbled to himself, and he jogged back to Sakura, taking her face back into his hands. “Sakura?” He questioned somewhat hesitantly, wanting to make sure she was okay but secretly hoping she wasn’t angry.

That seemed to do the trick. At the mention of her name, she perked up. Her gaze lifted to meet his, and although she was still breathing rapidly and her eyes were glazed over, he knew she was still paying attention to him. He smiled softly at her current state, and gently took her lips with his once more, softly soothing her confusion and worry. When he pulled away, he kissed her forehead softly and whispered, “Goodnight, Sakura. Sleep well,” before he slowly removed his hands from her cheeks and brushed his hand against her hair.

Before he could mess anything else up, he quickly turned on his heel and walked toward his room. When he reached the door, he turned to her and smiled softly once again, and a flicker of something Sakura couldn’t identify flashed in his eyes, before he disappeared through the door and into his room. It wasn’t until the door closed behind him, shutting him away completely from her view until Sakura finally whispered, “Good night to you too, Kankuro.”

Dazedly, she turned and fumbled with the lock on the door until it opened. She stumbled into her room, too exhausted to comprehend anything, until she collapsed on her bed. Within minutes she was asleep, taking with her the images and memory of what had happened in the hall only minutes before.

It would surely be hell in the morning.

 

 


	5. Risk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is currently under examination for revamping. Please bear with me while changes are made, though I anticipate that any necessary changes will be minor and only serve to enhance the length and quality of earlier chapters. Later chapters have already undergone changes, as they are longer and better developed. Thank you for your patience, and thank you for reading.

 

When the first light broke through and shone through Sakura’s bedroom window, the exhausted kunoichi merely groaned and turned her head further into her pillow, trying to drown out the sun’s soft rays of light. ‘I’m _so_ tired,’ she thought to herself over and over, ‘can it really be morning already?’

She rolled out of bed after another minute or so of groaning and mumbling to herself, stretching her arms above her head and letting out a loud yawn. When she had planted securely on the ground, and the blood was now successfully starting to pump throughout her body and engage her brain, the memories of the night before came rushing back at her all at once. More than once, Kankuro’s image flooded the forefront of her mind-his meeting her at the hospital, the restaurant, Gaara catching them in the basement, the kiss…

Sakura’s eyes widened and she bit her lip, trying to keep her body from trembling. She couldn’t have-they wouldn’t have…

However, the vivid memories of the kiss they had shared outside her door lingered in her mind, revealing it to be-without a doubt-true. Her lips tingled slightly from the memory of the feel of his lips on hers, and while her body and (she grudgingly admitted) heart were pleased about the sudden turn of events, her more realistic mind was not. What if she got hurt again? What if he was just using her? What if this ruins their friendship? What if it ruins her ambassadorship to Suna?

…And most importantly, what if it meant nothing to him at all?

Sakura resisted the urge to whimper, but it was difficult because of the already clenching pain of her heart; she could plainly feel it blossoming throughout her chest. She brought her hand up to her bosom and gently placed it over her heart, taking a deep breath and sitting back on her bed. She kept taking deep breaths like that for a few minutes, trying to regain her calm and focus her thoughts. Inwardly, she was confused, terrified, and overall completely freaking out. Her feelings for the Sand jounin were apparently much, much stronger than she had originally anticipated, and she was genuinely pleased about their shared kiss, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to take it if he was just playing around with her. Somewhere deep, deep down she didn’t think that was the case, but the memory of Sasuke’s rejection and defection was still fresh on her mind. It also didn’t help that she was confused and upset at the moment, so she logically deduced it would be best to listen to her head.

After a few minutes of sitting on the bed and worriedly considering the position she was in, she was finally composed enough to ready herself for a day of work.While she got ready for work and dressed herself, she had come up with a “plan of action”. While she was at work, she would ask some of the women she had befriended in the hospital about him, and she would see how likely it was that he would want a real relationship with her. Of course, that wasn’t a very fair appraisal of his intent, but she did need to know what kind of a person he was with women. She had always refused to make a decision before without being fully informed, and she would be damned if she started now.

* * *

“Really?” Sakura’s eyebrows rose, her expression portraying shock perfectly, even though it was a much different emotion than what she was currently feeling. Betrayal and extreme sadness were one of the top two, of course, but a feeling of bitter hurt and indignation at being used was the most prominent in her heart.

“Yes,” the nurse she was talking to muttered disinterestedly, picking at the remains of her sandwich, “Kankuro-sama has been around with a lot of women in this village. He’ll talk to them for a little while, testing out the waters, and then if he likes what he sees, he’ll use them to get what he wants out of them. Then when they wake up the next morning, he’ll be gone.” The nurse took another bite of her sandwich, a blank look on her face, as she continued on, showing only the smallest amount of bitterness in her tone, “but of course, there are some of us who don’t even deserve the time of day…” She stabbed the plastic fork to her salad into the remains of her sandwich with an almost bestial ferocity, and she stood up violently, nearly knocking her chair back onto the floor. Sakura jumped a little at the loud scraping noise of the chair, but quickly regained her senses when the nurse hastily gathered up the rest of her lunch and turned to Sakura, asking her if she had any more questions for her. Sakura stayed silent, merely shaking her head as an answer, and the nurse stalked off, throwing the remains of her lunch into the garbage can and pushed her way through the break room’s door. Sakura’s only thought, even through the intense hurt she was feeling at the moment, was, ‘Oh wow. Someone’s really bitter about being rejected, aren’t they?’ Fleetingly, the kunoichi allowed herself a very small, hardly amused smile.

 

* * *

For the next few days after her questioning of her nurse friend, Sakura had made it a point to remain busy in Suna’s hospital. After all, she was still trying to teach their staff more advanced techniques. Several of the nin were showing promising talent, and Sakura was no less than ecstatic. It seemed that everyone was getting along with her well within the village, and she was enjoying her stay there immensely.

Kankuro was just…well, Kankuro.

He was still the same loud, brash, smart-ass jounin that he had always been, although in the past few weeks the few people who could call themselves close to the puppet master were observing subtle changes in his persona. For instance, usually the middle sand sibling would walk the around the village for a while after a long day of training, but he had been starting to head home immediately afterwards, and increasingly more often he had been leaving about 5 minutes early from his training sessions. There were also several drastic changes in his demeanor. Where he had used to be extremely gruff in his tone and stand-offish in appearance, lately he had been becoming less and less bitter. He was even smiling sometimes, and helping villagers whenever they asked for it-something he had rarely done before because of the often ridiculous nature of their requests. Most surprisingly of all-to not only his family, but the general community as well-he was being nice to his sister Temari’s husband, Shikamaru Nara. While they were off duty they had often made it a point in the past not to look or speak at each other, but lately Kankuro had been tolerating his presence, and even nodding his acknowledgement to the Konoha native.

Naturally, Shikamaru was shocked and immediately ran home to notify his wife of her eldest’s brother’s sudden change in demeanor.

“He did _what_?” The blonde’s mouth hung open, her eyes conveying pure shock. “He never congratulated you on any of your promotions, our becoming a couple _and_ your moving here. He threatened to _kill_ you when you told him of our engagement. Hell, he even sulked and _glared_ at you _during_ our wedding vows! Why would he acknowledge you _now_?” She finished, completely dumbfounded.

Shikamaru shook his head and replied, “I don’t know,” and almost immediately muttered under his breath, “troublesome.”

“No,” Temari corrected her husband, eyes narrowing, “You don’t know _yet_.” Already her strategist’s mind was working frantically, the wheels clicking and turning at a rapid speed. “I know my brother,” she spoke, only halfway paying attention to what she was saying, “and he wouldn’t change so quickly unless something was going on to change him. The oaf’s too stubborn to change on his own.” She finished her thought process aloud, her eyes now showing the slightest bit of worry.

Shikamaru took not of this and sighed, dragging a hang over his face, “Don’t worry about him, Temari. I’m sure he’s fine.” The lazy ninja yawned, stretching his arms behind his head as he settled onto the sill of the window behind him. He stretched his legs out the length of the sill, and settled himself into a comfortable position before continuing, “He can take care of himself, even if something _is_ going on.We shouldn’t have to get involved, even if I know you want to.” He gave his wife a pointed look.

Temari huffed at him, and gave him a glare. “Of course I do, you idiot! He’s my little brother, and I don’t think you realize just how fragile those two still are from our childhood-at least emotionally. You have no idea what they went through, and my father-”

Shikamaru’s arms slipped around her lithe frame at the same time his lips met hers, barely moving at all. Almost instantly he pulled away to see her face flushed with love and embarrassment. He couldn’t resist the urge to smirk, and cockily replied, “Well, that shut you up.”

Temari ordinarily would have glared and been absolutely outraged at anyone who had the audacity to make that remark and sent them flying back to where they had come from via air, but she only blushed and muttered a quick, barely audible apology. Shikamaru caught it and smiled nonetheless, and gave her a quick kiss on her forehead, still holding her. 

 

* * *

Even with all of the changes taking place within Kankuro’s family, Sakura was finding it incredibly difficult to pick up on the good mood and Kankuro was starting to take notice. She had been avoiding meals with both himself and Gaara at all costs, and working incredibly late shifts at the hospital so that she would not be able to accidentally run into them. At first, it could all have been easily explained, but after so long, even Kankuro had started to catch on.

Meanwhile, all Sakura could do was work herself to the bone, trying to keep the unshed tears that were so obviously willing to burst from within herself at bay. After the nurses had filled her in on the Kankuro situation, she felt like she was truly ready to die, leave, _anything_ but stay here. She now knew that Kankuro was a playboy-and a rather substantial one at that-so she knew he wasn’t serious about her. How _could_ he have been, after she got a glimpse of some of his past flings that the nurses had inadvertently pointed out? They were _gorgeous_. What was she compared to them?

Even now, as Sakura was working in her office, she had trouble keeping back the tears that were threatening to spill. She couldn’t stop thinking about either the kiss, Kankuro himself or wondering if she was just one of the girls he wanted in the sack. More importantly, though, she couldn’t help but constantly hope besides the very slim chance she had that he actually had feelings for her. That was what hurt the worst-the constant hope in her heart and the logic that it would never happen. Even if she was frightened about giving her heart away to someone, she wouldn’t mind taking the chance and giving it to Kankuro, even in her terrified state-as long as he loved her back. She had been through a one-sided love “relationship” once, and now she feared it was happening again with Kankuro and herself.

Talk about pathetic. What was she, twelve again?

She could only let out a tiny sob and bury her face in her hands, the tears she had so desperately been trying to hold back now cascading from her eyes. The intensity of the sobs now grew frantic, as her mind replayed images of him in the arms of a different woman every night. It was then that she realized she was in love with him.

How could she have been so stupid? She should have never bothered with him, talked to him, hell, even looked at him! Now she had to deal with all of this heartbreak and pain all over again, only of course now it was a hundred times worse. Why did God hate her so much as to make her fall for men that were horrible for her-why?

She could only cradle her pink locks in her fingers as her head slowly came to rest on her desk. She was too caught up in her thoughts of him and her own inner turmoil to notice her eyes drifting shut and her body growing weary. She was too immersed in her despair to realize that she was slowly crying herself to sleep, just as she had done every night since Sasuke had left when they were twelve.

* * *

Kankuro was walking the calm, empty streets of Suna at an unusually late hour, but it couldn’t be helped. Ever since Sakura had started to ignore him, his own mind was entering a more and more distressed state. He was losing sleep and his own sanity, his thoughts only focused on her; in his profession, that was a horrible thing, but he could not bring himself to hate either himself or her for it. She wasn’t a bad person, really, and it was his own damn fault that he was attracted to her.

Really, though, what was wrong with her? She had been avoiding him ever since they had shared that kiss. It honestly wasn’t anything drastic-sure it was a big change in their acquaintanceship, but they would have worked that out long ago if she hadn’t been avoiding him. It frustrated him to no end, knowing that this could be over with-that his mistake could have been remedied-if only she would be willing to listen to him.

He knew from experience, however, that Sakura Haruno was not hard-headed for just any reason. There was always a reason for her to intentionally change her demeanor towards someone so quickly, and-taking into account of their unexpected kiss-Kankuro logically deduced it was her way of rejecting him.

He froze in place in the middle of the alley of which he was currently walking. No…she wasn’t rejecting him, was she?

Yes. Yes, she was!

What a cowardly thing to do, to hide away in an office like that because of one kiss, and to completely avoid him, her friend, after he took advantage of her faith. Yes, he deserved it, _yes_ , he was an ass, but she should still be able to give him a straight response!

He gritted his teeth in annoyance, trying to tell himself that he was upset more about her lack of faith in him rather than the actual heart-wrenching pain of rejection. Who was he to care if someone rejected him? There was always someone else that he could find, someone who could replace her in his heart…

As if it heart that thought, a heavy pain blossomed from within the puppet master’s chest, spreading its poison throughout every muscle and surface of his body. His whole frame shook with the pain of it, and he resisted the urge to fall on his knees.

However, he was not stupid-it was one thing that Kankuro of the sand was not-but this feeling, this intense pain, was making him so. She was the only thing causing it, and he had to get rid of it somehow.

What if…what if he got rid of her? Sent her back to Konoha…?

Yes, that could possibly work! If she so easily gave into her emotions and could not complete her work in Suna, it would certainly be grounds for removal. How could she be expected to perform if she couldn’t even look the Kazekage’s family members in the eye?

He instantly set off toward her office inside the hospital, already knowing that was where she would be at such a time of night-she was still trying to avoid him after all. Ignoring the lingering pain and protests from within his heart, his mind was frantically cheering, screaming and encouraging him to get rid of her once and for all.

Kankuro of the sand didn’t fall in love. What was he, a sentimental fool?

No!

He continued on his way, his mind set and a new determination burning in his eyes. He would get rid of her, he would!

Finally he reached the hospital and made his way up the stairs into hospital’s office area. He knew where Sakura’s office was-he had been here before, when they weren’t fighting. He navigated the twists and turns of the dark, dimly lit hallways and finally came to a stop at her door. After feeling one last twinge of pain from his chest, he hardened his resolve, jaw set, and opened the door only to find a sleeping Sakura, tears dried on her face, and resting on a mountain of paperwork.

Suddenly all of Kankuro’s anger turned to naught, and the thought of “God dammit” was the last thought his sudden independent side had before he gathered his pink angel into his arms and took her home to her warm, soft bed.

* * *

Kankuro knew, as he stood in the shower that same evening, that she needed him, even if she wouldn’t admit it to herself. He just didn’t know to what extent as he let the warm water flow over his tired, aching muscles.The desert heat from earlier in the day had especially worn him down, and his muscles were grateful for the release of tension. His entire body felt strained, mimicking his emotional and psychological state. Everything in his life made him feel like he was walking on a tight rope, suspended high over a crowd. An entire village’s eyes were all on him as he slowly made every deliberate step, as if they were waiting for the slightest mistake to declare that he had failed. Sakura was the only thing that had made it better until now, but now he could feel the intensity of her gaze on him as well as he walked that tight rope. And her gaze on him was quite possibly the most important thing he had going for him. He knew he could not afford to fuck it up.

 

Softly, Kankuro pressed his head into the wall of the shower stall, feeling the water from the shower head trickle down the bridge of his nose and cheeks. His hair dampened, and he let out a long, tired sigh as he thought of Sakura’s soft body tucked safely away in the comfort of her bed. He had made sure to set traps to protect her and he secured the window before he left the room, not that it would have mattered; if anyone had dared to enter the Kazekage’s residence with obvious intent to attack, it would have likely resulted in a swift execution. And if anyone dared to enter the chambers of a foreign dignitary, an important guest of Suna? All bets were off. The guards and family members within could attack at will and be legally protected in the event of a fatality. Still, Kankuro felt an overwhelming urge to ensure her safety, no matter how complicated their personal situation was. He knew, deep down, he always would.

 

He loved her. He hated the idea that he could be in love, a remnant of his father’s influence on him, but he knew it was true. He had known, honestly, since the moment he opened his eyes on that operating table and his blurred vision came to focus on those vivid green eyes and the small smile on her face. Sasori had nearly killed him, and that green spring of life had jerked him back into this world like the hand of death itself had thrown him back into the desert. It was so hard to be honest with himself when the situation was so complicated, though. Shinobi’s don’t have the luxury of relationships. As a former shinobi in training, he could only afford for his focus to be on his missions, his survival. While he did his best after the Sasori incident to sweep his feelings for Sakura under the rug, nothing could completely erase her, not even despite his best efforts. Even he couldn’t deny the way his heart skipped a beat when he laid eyes on a rug a little too close to the shade of her green eyes in the market, or the way his eyes sometimes played tricks on him and the swirling of sand in a breeze reminded him of how her hair played in the wind. For seven years his feelings had been allowed to foster and grow, a small piece of his heart yearning to express even a hint of the love he and his siblings had always been denied to the right to truly express as children. As children of the Kazekage, there were expectations to be respected, and that was first and foremost to maintain the image of strength with unemotional response. Temari took on that responsibility with eagerness and pride, and Kankuro quickly followed suit, though Gaara was, of course, deeply abused and removed from any public displays to the villagers.

 

Being aware of his feelings now, he supposed, was an advantage he did not have before, though he did not know how to communicate them. He didn’t even know if he wanted to. Gaara’s warning was still fresh on his mind: how was he going to stay away from her?

 

* * *

When Sakura awoke the next morning, it was the first time in three nights that she hadn’t groggily awoken to her cheek pressed into a hard textbook. She stretched luxuriously, feeling the satin of her bed sheets swirl around her.

 

How…?

 

The window outside told her it wasn’t long past dawn, so she knew she still had plenty of time to get a shower in and start her morning routine. She yawned and sat up, running a hand through her hair as she tried to piece together the events of last night. She had been working in her office, signing off on discharge paperwork for ICU patients. She remembered pulling the stack of medical records in front of her from the post-mission examination of a team of ANBU who had just completed a mission, and then she started… Ugh! She had started crying about Kankuro. Of all of the sappiest, girliest, most embarrassing things she could do! Her memory stopped there. She must have cried herself to sleep. She hated it when she did that, it made her feel weak. Ever since Sasuke had left, though, her emotions had been unbridled for the most part and easy to stir. She was a passionate creature, she knew, but she still hated how she was driven to tears so easily. _‘Except it’s not easy,’_ her mind whispered, _‘it’s because it’s Kankuro and you know it. You wouldn’t cry about Lee like this. You wouldn’t cry about Gaara like this. It has always been Sasuke…and now it is Kankuro, too. You just don’t know how to feel about that.’_

 

Damn it. She hated it when her inner was right, and she could feel the stabbing feeling of truth coming from her heart as the words struck in her mind. It was as if the words were coming from her heart at that very moment. “What am I to do, then?” Sakura wondered aloud, looking around the room as if noticing it for the first time. Everything seemed in order as she remembered the last time she was in her room a few nights ago. The only thing that had changed were the traps on her door. They were set up in a different style than her own—the wire was too high and the shuriken were positioned too low for her taste. She allowed herself a small smile at that, she knew who had brought her back by that observation alone:

 

_“What do you mean, you aim for the stomach?” Sakura asked, incredulously, as Kankuro trotted off happily in front of her through the market. Occasionally he would reach out to a vendor he knew particularly well and pluck a fruit from the top of their display, smirking as they would playfully reprimand him as they passed. He would always smile in thanks and wave while he maintained his quick pace walking backwards, before turning around and continuing his guided tour._

 

_“I_ **_mean_ ** _,” Kankuro chuckled, “That it’s more effective to set traps low like that if you’re going to be sleeping inside. You want something that will do some internal damage before they even realized what has happened. Plus, if you aim high, you risk killing the intruder prematurely. I’d rather have them hang on so I can see what information I can get out of them.”_

 

_“No shinobi worth their salt is going to break into another shinobi’s place of residence if they have an agenda or work for a high-ranking group like the Akatsuki. That’s the only way we will even want information from them. And sending a shuriken into an intruder’s stomach is hardly going to buy you any time at all. If anything, it just gives you time to get off your feet and out of bed before their hands are already on their weapons to attack. At least by aiming high if you pierce the lungs or heart, you have a greater chance of increasing your reaction time. Also, don’t forget, I’m a medic. If I need information, I can patch them up just the barest amount necessary before I haul them in. But I’m sadistic, so I won’t be too kind.” Sakura smirked and laughed, an evil laugh that was clearly exaggerated. Kankuro stopped for a moment before turning to her, a sudden uncharacteristic serious expression overcoming his visage. They had stopped somewhere near the far side of the square, past the main market in a secluded area where the buzz of voices no longer strongly carried through the air around them._

 

_“With that logic, I worry for your safety. Good thing you’ll be around for a while, since you can’t set a trap properly.” Kankuro grinned, though the amusement he supposedly felt didn’t quite reach his eyes, “that way you’ll have me around to protect you.”_

 

“Honestly,” Sakura sighed, “He worries too much. Who is going to attack the Kazekage’s mansion, in the middle of Suna?” Pulling a shirt out of her closet, Sakura allowed herself a small chuckle, “I mean, who in the world would ever be brave enough to face a Kage on their own, especially Gaara?”

 

* * *

Noon came quickly that day, since Sakura’s morning had been filled with meetings and playing catch up from the past several nights. She was lucky she had not awoken with a headache this morning after staying up late consistently over the past several nights. It was common for her to get headaches after pushing herself too hard.

 

The blinds in her office were doing a fairly decent job of blocking out the blistering heat of the desert sun, though the hospital’s air conditioning was working overtime to compensate for the open floor plan of the floors. Sakura frowned. That really wasn’t a smart plan in a hospital. Germs need to be contained as much as possible, and wide common areas for the nurse’s stations—while convenient for the nurse’s—certainly posed a higher contamination risk. It would be costly, but perhaps she could speak to Gaara about getting some financing for renovating the hospital. It was an older facility anyway; she could hear the air rumbling around in the vents above her whenever the air kicked on and off. The floors creaked and groaned with the stress of every day use. Some of the tiles on the floors were cracked, and there were also some places in the doorways where you could see the beginnings of cracks forming in the walls. The building was settling into the sand, and the foundation probably needed repair at that point. If not soon, it would definitely become an issue in the next few years—

 

“Sakura?”

 

A voice jerked Sakura out of her rumination, and she lifted her head from the paperwork she had been examining. She hadn’t quite decided if it was a feeling of relief or dread that encompassed her when Kankuro began to speak again.

 

“Gaara has asked for me to take you out to lunch today,” Kankuro shrugged, as if he didn’t really know how to initiate this conversation, either. “I know you’re busy, but I think we should go ahead and go now if you’re at a good stopping place. I’d like to go get burgers and fries again, and they stop serving lunch at 1pm.”

 

Sakura nodded slowly, though her brain had not quite comprehended the words he spoke until it was too late to take it back, “Sure. Let me just get this paperwork in order here and I’ll follow you over.”

* * *

The walk to the restaurant was uncharacteristically quiet for the both of them. It was especially so for Kankuro, who normally took every opportunity to ham it up with the locals and Sakura, too, when the opportunity arose. Sakura tried to feel out the space between them, though it was hard to gauge. He was as silent as stone, though his body language betrayed his nervousness. She could see his fist clenching and unclenching from within his cloak. Sighing, Sakura knew she would have to be brave and address it. 

 

“Thank you for taking me back to the house last night.”

 

Surprised, Kankuro turned to look at her, blinking a few times through the thin, mesh cover of his face protector before he turned back around to look ahead. Sakura was wearing her mask, too, a light grey to his black. While the forecast had not called for a sandstorm yet, the winds were picking up and were carrying in some sand from the desert into the city in strong gusts, so it had been advised for civilians to wear their masks today to block the sand. Sakura had purchased her own sand mask at the market shortly after her arrival, as she had learned the hard way that sand and strong winds can cut skin rather easily. Kankuro had joked for a week afterward that she was starting to take after Ibiki, the exam proctor for their chunnin exams. 

 

“You…don’t have to thank me,” Kankuro finally responded, uneasiness lacing his tone. He had taken his hands out of his pockets for a moment after she had thanked him, though he had flexed his hands again shoved them back in his pockets as he replied.

 

“Okay, what is going on?” Sakura shifted, moving to stop in front of Kankuro’s path as she placed her hands on her hips. “Is everything okay? Are you sick? Do you need me to look you over?” Sakura demanded, as she lifted her bare hand to cover his covered forehead. The long sleeve of her robe rode up, and the wind-whipped sand had already started to create cuts on her hand. Within a heartbeat, Kankuro’s hand rocketed upward, gathering Sakura’s hand in his and pulling it down to her side with a hiss. “Be more careful!” He snapped, “You know what happens when the sand is like this.” His eyes met hers with a glare.

 

Sakura’s temper flared, “Then _tell_ me what is wrong so I can _fix_ it!” Sakura snapped, “Or are we going to keep dancing around one another’s tempers until I have to go back to Konoha?”

 

Taking a deep breath, Kankuro raised his left hand to pinch the bridge of his nose. He desperately tried to calm his anger, “What if it is something that we can’t fix?” He muttered, as he noticed for the first time that he still held his hand in hers. He had been drawing soft circles over the top of her knuckles with his thumb as he held it, though she had not noticed, either, during her angry rant. He quickly withdrew his hand from hers and resumed walking, leading the way to the restaurant. Sakura stared after him, still angry but decidedly curious as well. What had got him so worked up? She knew that pressing him would never reveal any answers. Silently, she followed him through the windy streets.

* * *

Sliding into the same booth that they had spent such a fun night in just a few days before, Sakura finally had the opportunity to stare into the face of the man who had been the source of her previous nights’ distress. He had a five o’clock shadow coming in, and he had the beginnings of dark circles under his eyes as well. His cheeks looked somewhat sunken. Had he been eating?

 

The waitress came around to take their order within a few minutes, and while Kankuro ordered his meal Sakura pondered on what could be going on with him. She knew that they had left things unresolved with their kiss, but she did not have any reason to suspect that that would affect him so. He didn’t know of her discovery about the other girls he had had flings with, so what reason could he have to stress? And all of this was assuming he cared about her as more than a fling, which she was sure that he didn’t. So what could be causing him stress? A mission? Gaara pressuring him into more responsibility? His family in general? She had to get to the bottom of it.

 

“Kankuro,” Sakura asked softly, reaching across the top of the table and putting her hand on top of his, “What’s wrong?” Her eyes were soft, her tone genuine. She honestly wanted to know what was wrong so she could help him. Even if she couldn’t be with him, she still cared about him and considered him a close friend. She could at least do this for him.

 

A few moments went by, and Kankuro’s gaze had shifted to their clasped hands before it finally settled on her face. He seemed to be searching for something there, and it took him a few moments to find whatever he was or wasn’t looking for. He finally let out a long sigh, before upturning a coffee cup that had been settled on a saucer on the side of the table and motioning for the waitress to fill it with coffee. When his cup was full, he took a sip and turned to Sakura, removing his hand from hers but giving her his full attention. She took it as a sign he was finally ready to talk.

 

“I…I’m sorry about what happened the other night. In the hallway, I mean.” Kankuro casted his gaze downward, avoiding her shocked response.

 

“You…you think I’m angry about that?” Sakura asked, eyes wide.

 

“Well…aren’t you?” Kankuro’s eyes jerked back to hers, searching.

 

“Y—Well, yes and no.” Sakura started slowly, letting each word slowly pass through her lips as if they were molasses. She took her time, letting them roll off her tongue so she could chew and digest their meaning before they were offered to him.

 

“I—What does that mean?” Kankuro’s eyes furrowed in confusion. “Are you upset about the kiss at all?”

 

“No.” Sakura stated simply, offering the tiniest, barest of smiles. Kankuro tensed, his shoulders squaring, as he could read the uncertainty in her response. This entire conversation was painful for the both of them.

 

“Look,” Kankuro began tiredly, his lips pressed into a strained, firm line: “I’m sorry. I got too wrapped up in what a wonderful time we had been having together. You…you really seem to get me, and I got too carried away in that feeling. I have a lot of fun with you and I really enjoy your company. If that’s all you want it to be, I will back off immediately. No matter what, I will never do that or anything like that again without your blessing or without you asking me for it. I did not want to take advantage of you. If I have betrayed your trust, I am sorry. Please allow me to show you that I am a better man than I was that night. It was a mistake.”

 

Sakura sat back in her seat, mulling over the words Kankuro had just spoken to her. That…that didn’t sound like the words of a playboy. His words were earnest, she could tell. There was obvious warmth, respect, and affection in his eyes for her at that moment, and she could see the regret that his actions had caused in him. So he _had_ been affected by the kiss. That was certainly a surprise. Though she could only guess whether or not he was telling the entire truth. Had the kiss really been the reason that he was losing sleep? Not eating? Was there more to the story he was not telling her? Or did he really care about her? Her breath hitched in her throat.

 

Could he—? Could he possibly—? Could he possibly care for her?

 

As soon as her mind could comprehend it, it dismissed the notion entirely. She had already spoken with the other ladies in the hospital who confirmed that Kankuro was a playboy. No matter how gentle he could seem to be with her, she had to be careful.

 

“Are you seeing anyone, Kankuro?” Sakura carefully asked, stirring the spoon in her drink so as not to lead him to draw conclusions. She knew he was trained well enough to see that this was an interrogation technique, so he would be able to read her inquiry for what it was.

 

Kankuro raised an eyebrow, the ghost of a grin crossing his face even though the tense situation didn’t really allow for it. “Why, are you interested?”

 

“Just answer the question.” Sakura said, flatly.

 

“No, hime, I’m not seeing anyone. Why?” Kankuro said evenly, leaning forward in his seat. He clasped his hands together and placed his weight on them on his side of the table, so he could lean into her gaze. Another interrogation tactic, but it was so elementary Sakura felt the urge to roll her eyes. He wasn’t distrusting of her, then. She owed him the truth, she decided. Even if it wasn’t exactly good news, she decided to give him a chance to defend himself.

 

“Are you a playboy?” Sakura asked, no hint of amusement or spite in her tone. It was genuinely an honest question.

 

“I—What?” Kankuro asked, confused. He recoiled in his seat, blinking for a few moments. “Is—Is that what you think of me?” Anger began in his tone, but only just.

 

“No.” Sakura answered honestly, “But I have heard it from some of the women in the village—that you have a history of one night stands and leaving broken hearts behind. I just want to know, Kankuro: is that who you are? Is that what I can expect if I let you in to my already shattered heart?”

 

Several heartbeats passed as they both sat in silence, Sakura pointedly waiting on a reply. Their food had arrived sometime during the middle of their conversation, though both of their plates sat completely untouched. Their eyes were only on each other, their surroundings having long since disappeared into the background. Only the two of them existed. The waitress had long since given up on waiting on them, and had already left two boxes for them to go.

 

“Do you really think I could hurt you like that, Sakura?” Kankuro managed, his voice gruffer than he had wanted it to be. He cleared his throat, hurt remaining in his eyes. In response, she pressed her lips together tightly, contemplated for a moment, and then nodded as she started to gather her food into her to-go box. The simple task of boxing up her food captured her attention in totality, her mind elsewhere as she worked. Kankuro’s numerous attempts to regain her focus by calling her name fell to deaf ears, as her mind was whirling as she focused on her task. It was only when her to go box was in her hand and she stood at the end of the table that she turned to him again. She met the pained expression on his face with a blank one of her own, and said, “I think it’s best that we both focus on maintaining our professional relationship. We both have to do what is best for Suna, and I have to do what is best for Konoha as well. I am a foreign dignitary here, and I must bear my responsibilities in mind. I know you do, too.”

 

Her fingers fumbled as she dug into her wallet, before she placed enough to cover the meal on the table. She prayed that he couldn’t tell that her fingers were shaking as she barely managed it, but she knew that he had noticed. He was a jounin, after all. As she faced away from him, her lip started trembling and she clenched her eyes shut, willing the tears back until she could make it back to her office: “When you’re ready, find me again, Kankuro.” She managed, “And we’ll discuss the plans for updating the policies for isolation patients.”

 

With that, she walked away without another word.

 


	6. Chapter 6--Heart

Sakura! _Sakura_!

 

A voice called out to her, heavy footfalls pounding through the marketplace. She could hear the quick pace of the feet hitting the hardened sand of the road, even through all of the bustling and noise surrounding her. She had chosen to come this way to blend in to her surroundings, and it seemed to be doing the trick. She had the advantage of only a few moments head start, but she knew that he had the advantage of home territory and speed. He had always been faster than her.

 

SAKURA! The voice screamed, its tone approaching agony. Briefly, Sakura closed her eyes, her tears threatening to spill. This was the worst possible time, the worst possible place to give into her emotions. She just needed to make it back to her office…

 

A cart at that moment chose to obscure the path in front of her, having come undone from the stall it was hooked into as it rolled threateningly toward another merchant’s stall. Within moments, there was chaos in the marketplace as the shoppers nearby screamed and rushed to avoid getting pinned beneath the heavy cart. The elderly man operating the stall to her right was frozen, unable to move fast enough as the cart was careening toward him. There were only moments until he would be pinned between the cart and the walls of the marketplace, and he would likely not survive it.

 

Without even thinking about it, Sakura gathered a fistful of chakra and placed herself between the cart and the elderly gentleman’s stall, using her chakra-filled hands to first halt the cart and then push it in the other direction. The crowd began to cheer as she carefully wheeled it into a side-to-side position to keep it from rolling away, and the owner of the cart was then able to get it under control. The people in the marketplace were beginning to gather in a crowd to thank her, but she quickly avoided their attentions and sped off. She knew she had only moments before Kankuro found her, especially now that she had to stop hiding her chakra to stop the runaway cart.

 

“He will follow me to work—he’ll find me,” she panicked, trying to think quickly about her best option. “I cannot see him right now. If he finds me, I won’t be able to stop myself—I’ll forgive him and it will all be over!”

 

“I…I’ll go to the training grounds,” Sakura nodded to herself anxiously, as she took off in the direction of the North side of the city, the scorching sand and wind obscuring her pink robes as she ran off into the distance.

* * *

“You can’t run from your problems forever!” Kankuro furiously screamed, as he landed beside her at the training grounds. He had been searching for her for hours, beginning to become extremely worried when she failed to show up at the hospital or at home. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” He furiously demanded, even though he knew in the back of his mind that he was really asking, “Why the fuck are you hurting us like this?” 

The wind had started to really pick up, the sand swirling around them now seriously impairing visibility. The forecast had changed from a warning to a full blown sandstorm alert, only adding to Kankuro’s panic when he couldn’t locate Sakura.

 

“I’m training.” Sakura said simply, throwing another shrunken at a target. Drawing back, she actually was quite proud of herself on that one. A bullseye in a sandstorm and severely diminished visibility? Not bad. Shishou would be proud!

 

Kankuro suddenly ripped Sakura around to face him, wrapping his hands around her upper arms and gripping her tightly. Her eyes widening in shock, Sakura could finally see just how angry she was making him. His nostrils were flaring, his jaw set, but his eyes—his eyes contained a wild fury and such strong emotion that she had never before seen. He was a mystery to her, an enigma, and although she loved him she knew that his response could not entirely be for her sake. He was probably just upset that she was still outside in such inclement weather as she was his responsibility, but she hadn’t been able to bring herself to face him just yet.

 

“What” Kankuro ground out, his teeth clenched together in stress and fury, “the hell, Sakura? What the _hell_?” He was so furious, he was shaking. If Sakura weren’t a fully trained shinobi, a student of one of the legendary sannin…she may have been afraid. _May_ have been afraid. But a man’s anger she had seen before, and she knew she could defend herself, even against Kankuro.

 

“Here,” Sakura said, forcefully removing her robe as the sandstorm’s winds started to sweep around her bare arms. She took up a defensive stance in front of him, beckoning for him to make the first move. “If you want to fight, let’s fight! If you want to train me to protect myself, train me! If you just want to get some stress off your shoulders, let’s train together. But I am not going home, not yet.”

 

“Are—are you _crazy_?” Kankuro shouted in disbelief, eyeing the coming sandstorm through his veil. “You’ve never been in a sandstorm before, you have no _idea_! Get your robe back on—you are coming with me, NOW!” Reaching toward her, he grabbed her wrist, pulling her back to the direction of the Kazekage mansion. “Enough with this, we need to GO!”

 

“No!” Sakura yelled, tears finally coming to her eyes as the full reality of everything bared down on her. “Just let me stay, please! Just let me go.”

 

“I-” Kankuro started, his expression one of complete seriousness, “will never, _ever_ let you go.”

 

The roar of the sand was getting closer, and with such little time before it struck, Kankuro yanked her wrist toward him as he started running. “Leave your robe, MOVE!”

 

Not long after that, the sandstorm crashed over the training grounds, encompassing the city with its violent rage.

* * *

The heavy doors to the back entrance of the Kazekage mansion swung shut loudly, and Kankuro quickly turned around to secure the door with some wooden slats to reinforce it. The sandstorm hit just moments later, the doors buckling under the intensity of the wind and a few loose grains of sand skidding across the kitchen floor in spite of the nearly air tight design of the home. Panting, Kankuro placed his hands on his knees while Sakura leaned an arm against one of the cabinets. Neither of them said a word, taking a few moments to catch their breath. After a minute or so, Kankuro looked up at Sakura blankly, his expression unreadable, as he grabbed her hand in hers and tugged her along. Sakura couldn’t even find the energy to fight with him, she was so emotionally exhausted and worn down. Letting him drag her along, he didn’t stop until they came to the third floor, to where he led her to his room and let her inside, holding the door open for her. 

 

Gingerly, she took a few steps and came to a stop a few feet from the open door. His room was even more opulent than hers, though you wouldn’t know it with the touches he had made. It smelled of the earth and of wood polish. One section of the room housed what appeared to be a make-shift workshop, as there were a few wood shavings and tools laid out on a desk next to what looked like a puppet in-progress. On the other side of his room was a large, king size bed with black and purple sheets. He too had his own bathroom, which she could only see the entrance to. Overall, they shared much of the same characteristics in their rooms, but his definitely was suited more to his taste and felt more lived-in.

 

Turning back to Kankuro, she met his eyes and saw that he had had his arms raised, palms facing her, keeping his distance. He seemed nervous. “I’m not going to try anything,” he stated, slowly, as if approaching a wounded animal. “I just want to talk.”

 

Sakura regarded him for a moment, her distrust evident, before she slowly began to nod—barely discernible, but there. She would give him a chance to talk, she could grant that. She didn’t have the energy, though, to grant much more than that.

 

“Okay,” Kankuro swallowed, a lump suddenly in his throat. Nervously, he ran a hand through his hair, and he started to pace the floor in front of his door. “Fuck,” he groaned, lifting his head to the sky, closing his eyes. He turned to the wall and pounded a fist against it for a moment, albeit softly, as if he didn’t have much fight left in him either.

 

After a moment, he wheeled around on Sakura suddenly, facing her but always keeping himself between her and the door. She knew it was because he was afraid she would flee. She wouldn’t, though, not this time. They both needed to get this over with.

 

“You think I’m a playboy,” Kankuro said flatly, looking her in her eyes. “Why?”

 

“I asked some of the nurses at the hospital about you, after our kiss. I wanted to see if there was a chance that you were serious about me. They told me about your history with the girls in the village, and I drew my own conclusions.” Sakura answered simply. There wasn’t much else to say.

 

“You…you drew your own conclusions.” Kankuro nodded, trying not to give in to the slight anger that her statement had provoked. “Why didn’t you just ask me about it instead of becoming upset and ignoring me?”

 

“Because what else would a playboy do but deny it?” Sakura challenged, crossing her arms across her chest. She was defensive, she knew, but she had a right to be. “If I let you explain it away, I just would have let you in. How do I know you won’t hurt me?”

 

“You barely know me,” Kankuro growled lowly, a challenge in his statement that Sakura definitely noticed. “It was just easier for you to draw conclusions and hide from me.”

 

“We should just keep this professional.” Sakura pleaded, her eyes begging him to understand. “Please just drop it and let us do our jobs. I will stay away from you if that’s what you want. I won’t go near you and bother you ever again. I’m sorry I’ve been such a pain for you—”

 

“You _haven’t,_ that’s the _point_ , Sakura!” Kankuro hissed, once again reaching forward to grasp her arms, albeit gently this time. “You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. How am I supposed to just let you go?”

 

“You are beautiful, smart, perfect, all of these things in a perfect package that I know desperately I should never be able to touch. I know we’re on two sides of the fence, here. I know we’re not supposed to have a relationship with one another—your duty is to Konoha and mine is to Suna. _But I cannot stay away from you._ I cannot just turn this off, no matter how much I try. I—I feel really strongly about you, Sakura.” He looked at her in the eyes, piercing her very soul with his earnestness. He seemed desperate to make her understand.

“And as for what you were told--” Kankuro closed his eyes, releasing her from his grip and taking a couple steps back before once again meeting her gaze: “It’s true. I have slept with a few women in the village. It started when I was 17…” He trailed off, no longer able to look her in the eyes. His gaze shifted to somewhere to his left, staring a hole into his bedroom’s carpet. “…but I know that’s no excuse.” His eyes came back up to meet hers. “I was a kid, and everything was changing. My father had just died so I was finally free to do what I want. The counsel was pushing us to try to be adults and I didn’t know how to act. I’m sorry, Sakura, if it gave you the wrong impression, but I was dating each of the women I slept with. I just didn’t know how to have a relationship with them, and no matter how I tried, I just couldn’t bring myself to go any further with them. And despite the rumors,” He muttered, “I always did talk it over with them before I left them in the mornings. I told them I didn’t want to see them anymore, then I would leave. That’s the truth.” His gaze was unwavering, unquestionably earnest as he stared into her face, trying to gauge her reaction. Unfortunately for him, though, she had quite the unreadable expression she had mastered, courtesy of her old teacher, Kakashi.

 

“Thank you for telling me,” Sakura nodded, before she unfolded her arms and started moving toward the door to make an exit. “Sakura, wait--” Kankuro interjected, lunging in front of her once again to block her from the door. His hand was outstretched, stopped in midair just mere inches from her heart.

 

“What, Kankuro?” She asked warily, her gaze falling on the now desperate man. Despite her hardened persona, she was shattering on the inside. She didn’t know what to do, but she knew this wasn’t right. None of this was right, how could it be, it was all her fault, how did it get this far in the first place—

 

“Don’t go,” he pleaded, before straightening his back and rising to his full height in front of her. “Look, I know things haven’t been going well between us. Give me a chance to prove myself to you. To prove I’m loyal to you and only you. Sakura, you have no idea--”

 

“Kankuro,” Sakura cut him off abruptly, her tone now only reflecting her exhaustion. “Listen to me.”

 

“We have a duty to follow here,” she explained, though it pained her to do it. “I am sure Gaara has warned you what will happen if we pursue a relationship with one another— _we can’t_. They will send me back to Konoha and who even knows will happen to you! It will be the end of your career. You can’t do this to yourself,” she breathed, pain in her eyes as she took a ragged breath.

 

“No matter our feelings for each other,” she pressed on, forcing herself to meet his eyes, “we can’t let this continue. I’m sorry.” She met his gaze as an equal, as a partner. No fear, no intimidation, no lies. Just perfect honesty and trust, and in that moment he knew there was no defeating her in this decision. Trying to ignore the crushing pain of loss that rocked him, he tried to maintain some dignity in this painful rejection. He nodded, unfolding his arms. Forcing himself to move, he stepped to the side, unblocking the doorway for Sakura to exit. As she breezed past him, he caught a whiff of her hair—some sort of berry scent—and he couldn’t help himself, his heart burst out in longing: “You’re just running from yourself, you know.” It just spilled out, he wasn’t even consciously aware of where the statement came from although he knew it was right. “What happened to you?” He asked, hurt in his eyes although he looked as if if she chose to run into his arms at that very moment he would welcome it. He would gladly welcome a crying Sakura into his arms to comfort as she cried on his shoulder, if it meant they could put all this behind them and she could come home—truly come _home_ to him, in his arms. It truly pained him to see her hurting like this.

 

Choosing to turn back to him, even though she knew it was a mistake, she stared over his shoulder with a haunted look before she met his eyes once again with a broken: “he hurt me.” Then, shoulders slumped and tears beginning to pour from her eyes, she turned around and left the room, a stunned Kankuro left to stare at the closed door behind her.

* * *

“Where is he where is he where the _fuck_ is he?” Kankuro stormed through the Kazekage’s mansion, resisting the urge to start flipping furniture and throw things as his anger and heartbreak deemed appropriate. The search for his brother was not going well at the moment, and if there was ever a time he needed to speak to Gaara it would be _now…_

 

“Is there any particular reason you are storming our hallway with all of the noise of the third army?” Gaara asked stonily, although he was far from impressed with his brother’s sudden outburst.

 

“Don’t start with me, Gaara” Kankuro snapped, smacking his hand into the wall beside him as Gaara closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, tightly. “What is the real reason for this sudden display, Kankuro, and might I add that if you break a single thing I will sentence you to a year in jail?” Gaara tried to use a stern tone to imply that he was serious, even though they both knew it was an empty threat.

 

“What happened in Konoha?” Kankuro suddenly became deadly serious, stalking up to his brother and staring into his eyes with rapt attention. “Who hurt her?”

 

“Who hurt who?” Gaara asked, genuinely puzzled. His brother was making absolutely no sense, spewing nonsense.

 

“Sakura said ‘he hurt me.’ Who is ‘he,’ Gaara? What did he do?” His brother’s face was stony, his fists clenched and his breathing labored. Kankuro was seriously upset, and even if Gaara knew what had happened, he wondered if telling his brother was the appropriate thing to do. He didn’t want to subject his brother to prison for real in the event that his brother hauled off and killed someone in a rage.

 

“Are—are you talking about Sakura?” Gaara blinked, as the situation slowly started to register. Deciding it was safe since the boy in question was missing, he started: “She must have been talking about that teammate of hers, at least that is all that I know of. He is Naruto’s teammate that he has pledged to bring back, the missing Uchiha. He abandoned them when they were genin. Naruto has struggled to return him to Konoha ever since.”

 

“What the fuck did he do to her?” Kankuro paced, his mouth drawn in a tight line. There were lines creasing on his forehead, and he drew his arm up to rub his 5 o’clock shadow. Gaara could see that something was dreadfully wrong, though he knew he was not able to interfere. He decided in that moment that he would send Temari a message as soon as the storm let up so she could come talk to their distraught brother.

 

“Is there anything else I can help you with, Kankuro?” Gaara asked uncertainly, his sand swirling about him from the stress of the situation. Tension sat in the air between them like a thick fog, neither dissolving nor leaving with the waning conversation.

 

Kankuro paused his pacing, turning to face his younger brother. Braced with a sudden calm the eldest brother squared his shoulders—now free from tension—and asked a simple favor of his brother:

“Set me up a meeting with Naruto Uzumaki.”


End file.
